Reading List by Jayne for Fireside Guides: Part Two
Book Reviews / Reading ListsHumor / parodies / Reading lists4 Comments
I had fun with the first four Fireside Guides so reading the next set was a no-brainer.
The Fireside Grown-Up Guide to the Midlife Crisis by Jason Hazeley and Joel Morris
The international publishing phenomenon and ridiculously funny new parody series that helps grown-ups learn about the world around them using large clear type, simple and easy-to-grasp words, frequent repetition, and thoughtful matching of text with pictures.
Have you been having trouble with the How, Why, and Wheres? Well fear no more. The Fireside Grown-Up Guide series understands that the world is just as confusing to a forty-year-old as it is to a four-year-old. We’re here to help and break down the most pressing and complex issues of our day into easy-to-digest pieces of information paired with vivid illustrations even a child could understand.
You can’t stay young forever, but a mid-life crisis is an excellent way to try. In The Fireside Grown-Up Guide to the Mid-Life Crisis, we’ll explore the many ways one could choose to react to one too many missed cultural references, from abandoning your job and hunting whales to growing your hair out and buying an expensive pair of cowboy boots.
Midlife Crisis – Hmmm, this one is hitting a bit close to home. Some of those things resemble me! Not buying a coupe. But realizing how young college age students are? Oh, yeah. Been there and done that for a while. Sigh.
Jeff did not think of himself
as having a midlife crisis until
he realized that the people
starting college this year were
born when he was twenty-five.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
After his divorce, Nick sold his
sensible car and bought a coupe.
In ten years’ time, Nick will look
back at pictures of himself and
“the Lady” and realize that he
looked an astonishing dipstick.
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The Fireside Grown-Up Guide to the Cat by Jason Hazeley and Joel Morris
Some people may say that dogs are man’s best friend, but a pet cat can be the purr-fect companion. Like a cuddly toy, they are warm, fluffy, and do nothing to return their owner’s affection. In The Fireside Grown-Up Guide to the Cat, we’ll learn all about our feline friends, like what their favorite activities are (cats love to hunt and dismember their prey, especially important documents and valued possessions) and the reason they have nine lives (they sleep so much that they need nine to get anything done).
Yep, I have cats too. Four of ’em. Now I have to be concerned about what number of cats officially makes me a crazy cat lady. I’ve heard six so maybe I’m still safe.
Cats have sensitive tongues
and noses, so they develop
strong opinions about their
favorite foods.
It is a good idea to buy a lot of
your cat’s favorite food. That
way, you will have something
to throw away when she
changes her mind.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
They may seem selfish and
pampered, but cats can be very
useful as round the house.
If Zara did not have a cat, she
would have had to shred this
duvet herself.
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The Fireside Grown-Up Guide to the Meeting by Jason Hazeley and Joel Morris
Meetings are important because they give everyone a chance to talk about work, which is easier than actually doing it. In The Fireside Grown-Up Guide to the Meeting, we’ll get to know the colorful characters around the boardroom table, from those who have nothing to say but must say something anyway to those too busy putting their butt on the photocopier to attend the meeting in the first place.
Ugh, meetings. I try to avoid them. This is why I’ve not joined the ranks of “middle management.” They live for meetings.
People at work spend a lot of
the day in meetings.
Meetings are important
because they give everyone a
chance to talk about work.
Which is easier than doing it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
At a meeting, everyone has a
chance to have their say.
Most of the people at this
meeting have nothing to say, but
they say something anyway.
That way the meeting has not
been a waste of everyone’s time.
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The Fireside Grown-Up Guide to the Hipster by Jason Hazeley and Joel Morris
Any responsible and reasonably dressed adult may wonder from time to time: what is a hipster? In The Fireside Grown-Up Guide to the Hipster, we’ll learn how to spot a hipster—usually childless, unaccountably wealthy, and often bearded—as well as how to become one (wearing scarves, collecting LPs, and riding a unicycle is a good start).
Hipsters like to collect old
things that are unfashionable,
because that makes them
fashionable.
Vintage dishpans are highly
prized, because they look
neither retro nor valuable, and
are therefore both.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hipsters think plates are very
old-fashioned. They prefer to
eat from planks, tiles, and first generation
iPads.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What hipsters like best about
their favorite music is that
nobody really likes it.
This band is currently called
Donkiet Cong. They improvise
ironictronica based on 1990s
weather forecasts, using school
instruments and hindsight.
If anyone applauds, they split
up and re-form in the venue
next door with a new name.
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These look like they would be a good way to find out if I still have a sense of humor. I always thought I had a good one, but lately absolutely nothing seems funny. At all. The only other available test, I think, would be to retire and see if it comes back then. However, the end of 2018, when I plan to retire, may be too long to last as a sour, humor-deficient employed person.
@JessP: When I’m at work and want to stab someone with a spork, I find going to my cubicle and watching cat videos helps keep me from catching a charge.
Have you seen that A Street cat named Bob DVD is about to be released. I have watched the trailer and it looks good. Based on a true story. But my favorite cat video is : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q2dlMJbfYwE
@Michelle: OMC that is so funny! Guy is adorable.