Tuesday News: Book club lawsuit; millennial sex and romance; National Book Festival; unusual sex euphemisms
Lawyer for booted book club says women considering lawsuit against Napa Valley Wine Train – The Sistahs of the Reading Edge Book Club are considering a lawsuit for racial discrimination against the Napa Valley Wine train, and have hired an attorney (Waukeen McCoy) to investigate their options. As it turns out, this is not the only incident where women of color appear to have been targeted by Train employees. A Latina group on the train in April were similarly threatened with ejection for being too loud. The Wine Train is not doing a great deal for tourism in Napa Valley right now, but I’ll bet a lot of women want to join the book club (apparently they were reading a Brenda Jackson book on their Wine Train journey).
McCoy said an offer by Wine Train officials to host the women on another trip in a 50-seat private car was a “slap in the face” to his clients, who were humiliated by the incident.
He said the women want train employees to undergo sensitivity and diversity training so another group does not have the same experience. They also want financial compensation that was greater than the approximately $6,000-package offered by the train, McCoy said.
“I think it’s ridiculous for them to kick these women off the train and offer tickets to go back on it,” McCoy said. –Press Democrat
The millennials are all right, and so are their sex games – A really interesting piece about the games that millennials have been producing about sex, romance, and gender identity, and the way in which these games contradict the perception that millennials embody everything that’s bad about society, even though they are doing pretty much what every generation has been doing, except with the addition of Tinder.
But if you’re interested in exploring the reality of modern dating in ways that go beyond reductive stereotypes and punchlines, you’re in luck! Millennials themselves have been making games for years that talk about their relationships and sex lives in interesting and nuanced ways.
While many of them deal with the same universal concerns that have thrilled and plagued lovers for all time—finding connection, fearing rejection—they delve into more contemporary issues of sex and intimacy as well: definitions of consent, fluid notions of gender and sexual identity, and yes, how technology influences the way that people connect.
The ones that do it best tend to be small, independent games—often made with easy-to-learn tools like Twine—that focus directly on romance and sex, and allow individual voices and personal experiences to shine through. Mainstream gaming, by contrast, rarely focuses on romance and sex, except to provide heterosexual male-oriented visual titillation or create motivation for heroes. When they do simulate intimacy, it often takes the form of reductive mini-games where physical affection is unlocked by simply pushing the right series of buttons in the right order—a strategy that is rarely applicable in real life, regardless of what pick-up artists insist. –Boing Boing
Page and Perspective: A National Book Festival For the Ages -This year’s National Book Festival, sponsored by the Library of Congress and held in Washington, D. C., will be held on Saturday, September 5th, from 10am to 10pm. The event is free. This year’s theme, “I can’t live without books,” even includes a Romance panel:
From 7:15-9 p.m., it’s all about romance novels. This new festival addition will feature a discussion between NPR Books editor Petra Mayer and best-selling novelists Beverly Jenkins (Destiny’s Captive), Paige Tyler (Wolf Trouble), and Sarah MacLean (Never Judge a Lady by Her Cover), who is also The Washington Post’s romance book reviewer.–DCist
31 Adorable Slang Terms for Sexual Intercourse from the Last 600 Years – I actually came across this when looking for something else, and then couldn’t resist posting it. Need a new euphemism for nookie? How about fadoodling? Or Dance the kipples? Or put the devil into hell for that dark, rakish hero of yore? –Mental Floss
I thought it was “put the devil back into hell.” (Pretty sure that’s from The Canterbury Tales.)
Nice to see my college English Lit. class pay off. :)
And…I’m sure I’ll be in the minority on this one, but when you’re in an enclosed area with lots of other people/groups and you’re causing enough commotion that the others around you are complaining, and you’re asked more than once to please try to curtail your exuberance, I think the establishment has every right to ask you to leave. I don’t care if you’re purple with yellow spots. You have a responsibility to the others around you to have a good experience. The trip isn’t “all about”you!” If it was private with no others on the train, that would be different and they have every right to retain a lawyer. In this case, IF they were in fact rowdy enough to cause the other people around them to have a lousy experience, as one of those people around them, I’d be suing them for the cost of my ride.
It’s called being a decent human being and taking someone other than yourself into consideration.
@theo: “I think the establishment has every right to ask you to leave. I don’t care if you’re purple with yellow spots.”
First of all, we’re talking about black women who exist, not imaginary purple with yellow spot creatures who don’t. And it is a fact that black people are singled out for adverse comment and attention *because* they are black, even when the same behaviour in a white person is not considered a problem. Those ladies had paid their fare and were entitled to enjoy themselves as much as anyone else. Secondly, it’s a wine train, not a five star restaurant. The idea that one should sit with folded hands in total silences lest someone with delicate sensibilities be annoyed is simply ridiculous. We know the company felt they had to lie and exaggerate the description of what the group did because they *knew* that reasonable people would not find the actual ‘offence’ worthy of the punishment. Apparently the complainant was a single individual, and the company has a history of selectively punishing women of colour for ‘rowdiness’. This is so very obviously racial discrimination that I’m amazed anyone but white supremacists would defend it.
Honestly, theo, this is a comment unworthy of your usual sense and intelligence.
@Ann Somerville: My point with the ‘purple with yellow spots’ comment is, I don’t care what color you are. You have a certain responsibility when it is NOT a private car to take the other travelers/party-goers/paying people into consideration. I’ve been on jaunts with white women who could outdo a bunch of hyenas! I didn’t care what color they were. I cared that any enjoyment I might have gotten out of the experience was totally ruined by their shrieking laughter and inappropriate comments and actions with no thought to anyone else around them. Had I thought I could have gotten my money back, I’d have tried. This group had been asked several times to please, tone it down to no avail, The problem was, to put them off would have ended them in the middle of the Detroit river. If you want to act like a bunch of idiots, rent the private car and have at it. You’ll enjoy yourself more that way anyway.
All I can go by is what I read. If they were truly obnoxious, and I have no idea, I’ve seen no video and don’t know that there is any available, I didn’t look, but if that is the case here, the establishment has every right to put them off the train, bus, what have you regardless of color. They had been asked more than once. Once should have been enough. One can still enjoy themselves without getting to the point where you are beyond annoying. Apparently, the story I read stating there were ‘several complainants’ must have been wrong. And the only history was the other group that was ejected. I don’t though have a basis to know if this is a pattern because I have no idea how long the train has been in business, how many times the train has run…I don’t know. I’m not trying to make excuses for the train people. I don’t have enough information except from what I’ve read. Maybe the train people are the A-holes. Again, all I can go by is what I’ve read. I do know I would not be a customer of theirs exactly because that kind of behavior makes me crazy so I don’t put myself in a situation where people can get overly rowdy/blasted and obnoxious anymore. I don’t even like sports venues anymore because I seem to be a magnet for drunken idiots. But that’s me. I don’t think it’s unreasonable however to have an expectation that I’ll be able to enjoy myself. I didn’t say they shouldn’t have a great time. But if my ‘great time’ means I’m so obnoxious that others are complaining, maybe I need to reassess what I’m doing.
Hey Theo:
I just wanted to explain one point: the “purple with yellow spots” thing. I’ve learned, the harder way, that it’s similar to the “but I don’t see color!” or “I have [xyz] friends!” as a sensitivity. It glosses over the reality that people like you and me felt harmed. It removes empathy from the situation, if we phrase it into the hypothetical fictional fantasy people. It can also be used to bypass genuine discussions of racism.
Not saying you meant it that way–like me, I’m sure you didn’t. But it’s a learned experience of being a “minority” or common target of aggression due to sexism, racism, choose-your-ism. It’s not the always the overt things that cut deepest; most times it’s the microagressions, the deaths of a thousand cuts. Being female in male-dominated spaces, I know how hard it is to fight against what is perceived as “the little things,” the sly assumptions based on gender, the smallest insults delivered oh-so-reasonably. Often we think, “was it just me?” and we try to downplay it, even as the weight in our gut gets heavier. It’s why I tend to believe the related experiences of people that are discriminated against–sometimes we get a persecution complex, but more often we develop a pretty good radar on when we’re getting treated unfairly.
I hope that helps. Best,
~elf
” I don’t though have a basis to know if this is a pattern because I have no idea how long the train has been in business, how many times the train has run…I don’t know. I’m not trying to make excuses for the train people. I don’t have enough information except from what I’ve read.”
I’ve got some links for you. They weren’t hard to find, and I’m surprised that you somehow missed them based on what you’ve “read”
http://abc7news.com/news/apology-issued-after-book-club-booted-off-napa-wine-train/955712/
There was more to the story, like others coming forward with experiences of being singled out, and even comments by people admitting that others who acted up (but happened not to be minority) weren’t escorted off the train in similar fashion. There was also a witness who disputed that the book club was, and I quote:
“following verbal and physical abuse towards other guests and staff, it was necessary to get our police involved.” (quote from the now deleted Facebook post by an ill-informed Napa Valley spokesperson -that I have a screen shot of)
Another link: http://www.cnn.com/2015/08/25/us/napa-wine-train-laughing-while-black-feat/
“The Napa Valley Wine Train was 100% wrong in its handling of this issue,” CEO Anthony Giaccio said in a statement. “We accept full responsibility for our failures and for the chain of events that led to this regrettable treatment of our guests.”
And this: “Giaccio, the CEO, later apologized for the Facebook post, saying it did not reflect events as they occurred.”
So there was no “verbal or physical abuse” as claimed, and whatever caused the ladies to be escorted off was not “reflected as they occurred.” This wasn’t simply about women laughing too loud or as you stated “causing a commotion.”
@elf: I appreciate your comments, but I’m female and have worked in a male dominated field (off and on) for well over 40 years, a field where women were stupid when it comes to anything automotive. I put up with the ‘little lady’ syndrome, the ‘you need a new kanute valve’ syndrome and all the other things that went with it until I was so sick of it, I could have exploded. But I didn’t. I worked hard to prove myself and gain the respect of those in that same field. It didn’t mean I didn’t have a responsibility to be a conscientious human being. And maybe that’s what’s wrong here. Pay a little money and people feel entitled to do whatever, and sometimes, money isn’t even part of the equation. That whole entitlement idea is going to cost us dearly someday.
As I stated, I can only go by what I’ve read. I don’t really care what color the women were. They lost me when they couldn’t take into account all of the other people on the train and how their actions might affect those around them. Were the train people right? Again, I can only go by what I read, but if you’re asked more than once to scale back what you’re doing, eventually, getting the boot because you can’t be bothered is what you deserve. White, black, red or yellow. I don’t care.
@wikkidsexycool: I’m sorry, but the initial articles didn’t incense me enough to go digging for any further information. It is what it is. They were tossed off, from what you’ve posted, the CEO from your link has apparently stated they handled it wrong, it’s gained some national attention so I doubt the train people will handle something like that the same way again. However, neither you, nor I know if in fact they were simply being fun riders or if they were ‘causing a commotion’ because we weren’t there. So regardless of the links you’ve posted, I stand by my comments.
This is for information purposes only and not directed at anyone.
Slate.com compiled a few older customer complaints of the wine train on YELP:
A 2010 post complained of a group of six people “yelling loudly over each other in Italian,” who were apparently not kicked off the train.
A 2011 post complained that the “loud party sitting near us began getting sick” and said the complaining couple were reseated.
A 2011 post describes “two loud drunk couples whom multiple people asked the maitre’d politely to move and she asked them but they said they were ok. There were lots of complaints and the couples were talking loudly and inappropriately.” The group was not removed from the train, and they weren’t even moved to the empty dining car.
A 2012 post complained that “older ladies” on the train were loud and one was flashing people, and they were apparently not removed.
Link: http://www.slate.com/blogs/the_slatest/2015/08/24/napa_valley_wine_train_was_a_book_club_kicked_off_of_this_wine_tour_because.html