Feb
07
2008
Via Gizmodo
First off I want you to know I can’t believe this has even been patented. Or maybe I shouldn’t be so naive. But for guys out there that have a brain that freezes when trying to think of a unique gift for their wife/girlfriend maybe they should be hoping that patent holder Paul Lyons finds a manufacturer for his “condom that plays music with every thrust”. And if that isn’t appealing enough to your loved one, you would also have the possibility to add your own prerecorded messages. Ladies (or men), does this sound appealing?
I’m imagining the “Hallelujah Chorus” or “1812 Overture.”
Or “Oh Yeah” by Yello.
So not telling my husband about this……
I was thinking more along the lines of AC/DC. “I’ve Got Big Balls…”
Would the pre-recorded message be used on a vibrator? I can’t imagine why you would want a pre-recorded message.
A message from a slutty hero to his heroine:
“My dear Valentine,
You have to use this now, because I’ve just been diagnosed with herpes. I did not have the guts to tell you in person.
Love,
Your hero”
Wouldn’t that be the slutty former boyfriend that turns the heroine into a man hater that only the super smexxy hero can overcome?
So Meljean, would that be the prerecorded message playing on the condom? Because that could be a serious mid-event mood killer.
And now that I’ve spent the better part of my day pondering this condom singing apparatus, wouldn’t the songs and prerecorded messages be muffled somewhat considering their locations when thrusting?
Clearly I have way too much time on my hands and I should go write.
I want it to say “I’m too sexy for this fuck.”
How ’bout the ‘I like big butts’ song?
Not telling my husband about this, either.
So of course, I had to go to youtube.
Gotta say, the soundtrack doesn’t improve the mental image this think evokes.
Can it play back Alan Rickman reading a Shakespeare sonnet or well, pretty much anything?
There is already a vibrator on the market with one of those sound-recording chips that allows people to record a message for their loved one. (Get your minds out of the gutter — I know about this because I know people in the silicon chip industry.)
You know, I’d like to say I’m surprised by that… uh… toy.
But I’m not.
There’s also that vibrator that connects to your iPod and pulses/vibrates to the beat of the music.
Now THAT’s when you want that 1812 Overture to be playing!
Giddy-Up Lone Ranger– YEE-HAW!
There is already a vibrator on the market with one of those sound-recording chips that allows people to record a message for their loved one.
So…theoretically one could put on the Serenity DVD and hit the record button just as Mal says “I aim to misbehave”?
Just a research question, of course.
Test Testing 123