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	<title>Comments on: Defining the Meaning of Plagiarism for the Fiction Community</title>
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	<pubDate>Thu, 08 Jan 2009 02:12:11 +0000</pubDate>
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		<title>By: Jess</title>
		<link>http://dearauthor.com/feeder/?FeederAction=clicked&amp;feed=Articles+%28RSS2%29&amp;seed=http%3A%2F%2Fdearauthor.com%2Fwordpress%2F2008%2F01%2F22%2Fdefining-the-meaning-of-plagiarism-for-the-fiction-community%2F&amp;seed_title=Defining+the+Meaning+of+Plagiarism+for+the+Fiction+Community/comment-page-2/#comment-129963</link>
		<dc:creator>Jess</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 30 Jan 2008 09:12:16 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description>A quick note about Cassie Edwards
Unfortunately, I had the wonderful oppertunity to read one of her books in the last few weeks.  Working with a Native American Cultural and Research Center who gathers all literature about their tribe, they just happened to have a copy and encouraged my friend and I to read the awful book and highlight all of the things Cassie Edwards got wrong about the tribe.  And for being a tribe with a very distinct culture, she got a lot of stuff wrong.  Our hightlighter was dry by the middle of the book.  

I would suggest also remembering the tribes and their cultures that she mangles and destroys with the books she writes.  Honestly, how can you say that your writing a series to "give a voice to the Indians" (something along that line was printed in the back of the book which is in the hands of the museum) then repersent a stereotyped version of their culuture.  

I know this comment doesn't fit the plagiarism motif, but thsi is just another thing to keep in mind when discussing the hideous writings of Cassie Edwards.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>A quick note about Cassie Edwards<br />
Unfortunately, I had the wonderful oppertunity to read one of her books in the last few weeks.  Working with a Native American Cultural and Research Center who gathers all literature about their tribe, they just happened to have a copy and encouraged my friend and I to read the awful book and highlight all of the things Cassie Edwards got wrong about the tribe.  And for being a tribe with a very distinct culture, she got a lot of stuff wrong.  Our hightlighter was dry by the middle of the book.  </p>
<p>I would suggest also remembering the tribes and their cultures that she mangles and destroys with the books she writes.  Honestly, how can you say that your writing a series to &#8220;give a voice to the Indians&#8221; (something along that line was printed in the back of the book which is in the hands of the museum) then repersent a stereotyped version of their culuture.  </p>
<p>I know this comment doesn&#8217;t fit the plagiarism motif, but thsi is just another thing to keep in mind when discussing the hideous writings of Cassie Edwards.</p>
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		<title>By: Bev(BB)</title>
		<link>http://dearauthor.com/feeder/?FeederAction=clicked&amp;feed=Articles+%28RSS2%29&amp;seed=http%3A%2F%2Fdearauthor.com%2Fwordpress%2F2008%2F01%2F22%2Fdefining-the-meaning-of-plagiarism-for-the-fiction-community%2F&amp;seed_title=Defining+the+Meaning+of+Plagiarism+for+the+Fiction+Community/comment-page-2/#comment-126679</link>
		<dc:creator>Bev(BB)</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 24 Jan 2008 20:08:57 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description>&lt;blockquote&gt;Bev(BB) for prez! *ahem* (and apologies for mangling your handle earlier *wince*)&lt;/blockquote&gt;

Har, har. And thank you very much but no thanks. And no apologies necessary. ;) 

Sorry for taking so long to reply but my allergic asthma seems to be kicking up at the end of the cold I've had for the last few weeks and I've been a little preoccupied overnight. So, I'm off to the doctor this afternoon.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote><p>Bev(BB) for prez! *ahem* (and apologies for mangling your handle earlier *wince*)</p></blockquote>
<p>Har, har. And thank you very much but no thanks. And no apologies necessary. ;) </p>
<p>Sorry for taking so long to reply but my allergic asthma seems to be kicking up at the end of the cold I&#8217;ve had for the last few weeks and I&#8217;ve been a little preoccupied overnight. So, I&#8217;m off to the doctor this afternoon.</p>
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		<title>By: Karmyn</title>
		<link>http://dearauthor.com/feeder/?FeederAction=clicked&amp;feed=Articles+%28RSS2%29&amp;seed=http%3A%2F%2Fdearauthor.com%2Fwordpress%2F2008%2F01%2F22%2Fdefining-the-meaning-of-plagiarism-for-the-fiction-community%2F&amp;seed_title=Defining+the+Meaning+of+Plagiarism+for+the+Fiction+Community/comment-page-2/#comment-126358</link>
		<dc:creator>Karmyn</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 24 Jan 2008 02:06:22 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description>This weekend I had a few quiet minutes with my neices while Mom was in the store picking up a few groceries. The girls are ages 9 and 11 and good students. I asked them if it was right to copy directly from the dictionary for a report. They both answered no. I then gave a brief synopsis of what had happened. I am happy to say that the 11 year old had heard of Nora Roberts. I don't think she's ever read her books, though. I am very careful about what I let them read of mine. Most romances are a lot more explicit then when I read them at her age.
Both girls expressed that Cassie Edwards was wrong and should be punished. Smart kids.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>This weekend I had a few quiet minutes with my neices while Mom was in the store picking up a few groceries. The girls are ages 9 and 11 and good students. I asked them if it was right to copy directly from the dictionary for a report. They both answered no. I then gave a brief synopsis of what had happened. I am happy to say that the 11 year old had heard of Nora Roberts. I don&#8217;t think she&#8217;s ever read her books, though. I am very careful about what I let them read of mine. Most romances are a lot more explicit then when I read them at her age.<br />
Both girls expressed that Cassie Edwards was wrong and should be punished. Smart kids.</p>
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		<title>By: Poison Ivy</title>
		<link>http://dearauthor.com/feeder/?FeederAction=clicked&amp;feed=Articles+%28RSS2%29&amp;seed=http%3A%2F%2Fdearauthor.com%2Fwordpress%2F2008%2F01%2F22%2Fdefining-the-meaning-of-plagiarism-for-the-fiction-community%2F&amp;seed_title=Defining+the+Meaning+of+Plagiarism+for+the+Fiction+Community/comment-page-2/#comment-126313</link>
		<dc:creator>Poison Ivy</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2008 23:33:39 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description>I put my money where my mouth was today. I went to two library systems, told the librarians about the CE situation, and got the paperwork to make a request to remove her books from the library. (Yes, such paperwork exists because requests to remove books are not rare.) I also donated a tiny amount of money to a library book sale to buy a copy of one of Janet Dailey's plagiarism-filled novels, and I will personally shred it and send the paper to the county recycle dump. (Much as the thought of destroying books horrifies me on principle, a book filled with stolen words is sheer poison and should be changed into something clean and useful.) I intend to continue to buy up cheap copies of such works and recycle them, thus helping library budgets and removing vileness from potential readers. I admit that doesn't make any inroads into Cassie Edwards' royalties off Paul Tolme's ferrets. But it's what I could do today.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I put my money where my mouth was today. I went to two library systems, told the librarians about the CE situation, and got the paperwork to make a request to remove her books from the library. (Yes, such paperwork exists because requests to remove books are not rare.) I also donated a tiny amount of money to a library book sale to buy a copy of one of Janet Dailey&#8217;s plagiarism-filled novels, and I will personally shred it and send the paper to the county recycle dump. (Much as the thought of destroying books horrifies me on principle, a book filled with stolen words is sheer poison and should be changed into something clean and useful.) I intend to continue to buy up cheap copies of such works and recycle them, thus helping library budgets and removing vileness from potential readers. I admit that doesn&#8217;t make any inroads into Cassie Edwards&#8217; royalties off Paul Tolme&#8217;s ferrets. But it&#8217;s what I could do today.</p>
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		<title>By: azteclady</title>
		<link>http://dearauthor.com/feeder/?FeederAction=clicked&amp;feed=Articles+%28RSS2%29&amp;seed=http%3A%2F%2Fdearauthor.com%2Fwordpress%2F2008%2F01%2F22%2Fdefining-the-meaning-of-plagiarism-for-the-fiction-community%2F&amp;seed_title=Defining+the+Meaning+of+Plagiarism+for+the+Fiction+Community/comment-page-2/#comment-126303</link>
		<dc:creator>azteclady</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2008 22:57:48 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description>Bev(BB) for prez! *ahem* (and apologies for mangling your handle earlier *wince*)</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Bev(BB) for prez! *ahem* (and apologies for mangling your handle earlier *wince*)</p>
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		<title>By: Bev(BB)</title>
		<link>http://dearauthor.com/feeder/?FeederAction=clicked&amp;feed=Articles+%28RSS2%29&amp;seed=http%3A%2F%2Fdearauthor.com%2Fwordpress%2F2008%2F01%2F22%2Fdefining-the-meaning-of-plagiarism-for-the-fiction-community%2F&amp;seed_title=Defining+the+Meaning+of+Plagiarism+for+the+Fiction+Community/comment-page-2/#comment-126301</link>
		<dc:creator>Bev(BB)</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2008 22:54:20 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description>&lt;blockquote&gt; even though they may not be "online" in the same way most of us are. &lt;/blockquote&gt;

Oh, I don't think you are or anyone else is. However, I do tend to believe that we often overlook the power of the Internet as a tool at times. 

Consider this, I'm sure Ms. Roberts would've been extremely gratified over the years if, instead of search engines routinely spitting out Janet Daily's current works, they instead produced first and foremost a page (or even pages) listing the books that were proven plagarized from Ms. Roberts. Yes, I can hear the gasps now about beating dead horses but this information is also historical fact that somehow very few seem to know about. Such is already the power of search engines and yet oddly enough people have to search "extra" for it? Weird doesn't cover that. Suspicious comes closer. 

It is within the power of the reader community to start changing that while at the same time both educate ourselves and publicise the issue. Is this not what we are talking about here? Defining the problem? Showing support for the victims, past and future? Proving that we are advocates for changes in attitudes rather than letting them continue as they are?</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote><p> even though they may not be &#8220;online&#8221; in the same way most of us are. </p></blockquote>
<p>Oh, I don&#8217;t think you are or anyone else is. However, I do tend to believe that we often overlook the power of the Internet as a tool at times. </p>
<p>Consider this, I&#8217;m sure Ms. Roberts would&#8217;ve been extremely gratified over the years if, instead of search engines routinely spitting out Janet Daily&#8217;s current works, they instead produced first and foremost a page (or even pages) listing the books that were proven plagarized from Ms. Roberts. Yes, I can hear the gasps now about beating dead horses but this information is also historical fact that somehow very few seem to know about. Such is already the power of search engines and yet oddly enough people have to search &#8220;extra&#8221; for it? Weird doesn&#8217;t cover that. Suspicious comes closer. </p>
<p>It is within the power of the reader community to start changing that while at the same time both educate ourselves and publicise the issue. Is this not what we are talking about here? Defining the problem? Showing support for the victims, past and future? Proving that we are advocates for changes in attitudes rather than letting them continue as they are?</p>
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		<title>By: azteclady</title>
		<link>http://dearauthor.com/feeder/?FeederAction=clicked&amp;feed=Articles+%28RSS2%29&amp;seed=http%3A%2F%2Fdearauthor.com%2Fwordpress%2F2008%2F01%2F22%2Fdefining-the-meaning-of-plagiarism-for-the-fiction-community%2F&amp;seed_title=Defining+the+Meaning+of+Plagiarism+for+the+Fiction+Community/comment-page-2/#comment-126291</link>
		<dc:creator>azteclady</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2008 22:28:42 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description>Beb(QQ), I'm not dismissing the power of the internet! Indeed, just before the bit you quoted I said,&lt;blockquote&gt;Educating our fellow readers? Many of us are doing what we can. Writers are posting about it in their blogs, it’s being discussed in forums, books under CE’s name are still being combed over for plagiarized bits, and the pdf document updated as more evidence comes to light.&lt;/blockquote&gt;My question after that was in good faith, and I'm happy to see more suggestions being brought up.

Incidentally, I think that it would really be great to have a centralized document--or at least a repository of links, if you will--not just for the CE evidence but for other cases that have been mentioned during the past couple of weeks (Ms Robert and JD, Ms Andrews and Ian McEwan, &lt;a href="http://www.likesbooks.com/cgi-bin/bookReview.pl?BookReviewId=3436" rel="nofollow"&gt;Linda Howard and Christina Dodd&lt;/a&gt;, and any others that I've missed). I have also enjoyed greatly all the posts and essays on the issue of plagiarism vs research vs personal voice, etc. by many of the authors who have posted both here and at the SBs (you all know who you are), and have been keeping a list of links to them too. Another way to educate both readers and writers, I hope.

Sheryl Nantus,&lt;blockquote&gt;if you don’t know what plagarism is, what the heck are you doing writing? And then what ARE you writing, eh?&lt;/blockquote&gt;I have no doubt that the second question has popped up in many a reader's mind, and that it has contributed to the nervousness some writers are feeling over the course of these conversations. I hope that the more accurate information (SB's primer is excellent, as are Jane's and Janet's discussions on the topic) there is around for us to point at, the better.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Beb(QQ), I&#8217;m not dismissing the power of the internet! Indeed, just before the bit you quoted I said,<br />
<blockquote>Educating our fellow readers? Many of us are doing what we can. Writers are posting about it in their blogs, it’s being discussed in forums, books under CE’s name are still being combed over for plagiarized bits, and the pdf document updated as more evidence comes to light.</p></blockquote>
<p>My question after that was in good faith, and I&#8217;m happy to see more suggestions being brought up.</p>
<p>Incidentally, I think that it would really be great to have a centralized document&#8211;or at least a repository of links, if you will&#8211;not just for the CE evidence but for other cases that have been mentioned during the past couple of weeks (Ms Robert and JD, Ms Andrews and Ian McEwan, <a href="http://www.likesbooks.com/cgi-bin/bookReview.pl?BookReviewId=3436" rel="nofollow">Linda Howard and Christina Dodd</a>, and any others that I&#8217;ve missed). I have also enjoyed greatly all the posts and essays on the issue of plagiarism vs research vs personal voice, etc. by many of the authors who have posted both here and at the SBs (you all know who you are), and have been keeping a list of links to them too. Another way to educate both readers and writers, I hope.</p>
<p>Sheryl Nantus,<br />
<blockquote>if you don’t know what plagarism is, what the heck are you doing writing? And then what ARE you writing, eh?</p></blockquote>
<p>I have no doubt that the second question has popped up in many a reader&#8217;s mind, and that it has contributed to the nervousness some writers are feeling over the course of these conversations. I hope that the more accurate information (SB&#8217;s primer is excellent, as are Jane&#8217;s and Janet&#8217;s discussions on the topic) there is around for us to point at, the better.</p>
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		<title>By: Sheryl Nantus</title>
		<link>http://dearauthor.com/feeder/?FeederAction=clicked&amp;feed=Articles+%28RSS2%29&amp;seed=http%3A%2F%2Fdearauthor.com%2Fwordpress%2F2008%2F01%2F22%2Fdefining-the-meaning-of-plagiarism-for-the-fiction-community%2F&amp;seed_title=Defining+the+Meaning+of+Plagiarism+for+the+Fiction+Community/comment-page-2/#comment-126280</link>
		<dc:creator>Sheryl Nantus</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2008 22:03:51 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description>Well, I plan to bring it up at a new writing group I'm starting this weekend. Discuss it, dissect it, read over the Newsweek article and just plain old chat about it.

Information is power - and alerting as many people as you can will help spread the word about this and allow people to make up their own minds.

Although I'm with you *points up* - if you don't know what plagarism is, what the heck are you doing writing? And then what ARE you writing, eh?</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Well, I plan to bring it up at a new writing group I&#8217;m starting this weekend. Discuss it, dissect it, read over the Newsweek article and just plain old chat about it.</p>
<p>Information is power - and alerting as many people as you can will help spread the word about this and allow people to make up their own minds.</p>
<p>Although I&#8217;m with you *points up* - if you don&#8217;t know what plagarism is, what the heck are you doing writing? And then what ARE you writing, eh?</p>
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		<title>By: Bev(BB)</title>
		<link>http://dearauthor.com/feeder/?FeederAction=clicked&amp;feed=Articles+%28RSS2%29&amp;seed=http%3A%2F%2Fdearauthor.com%2Fwordpress%2F2008%2F01%2F22%2Fdefining-the-meaning-of-plagiarism-for-the-fiction-community%2F&amp;seed_title=Defining+the+Meaning+of+Plagiarism+for+the+Fiction+Community/comment-page-2/#comment-126279</link>
		<dc:creator>Bev(BB)</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2008 21:54:05 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description>&lt;blockquote&gt;But how do we reach the vast majority of CE readers out there, to make them see that they have been buying what essentially amounts to stolen property, and convince them to stop? How can we reach them if not through the press?
&lt;/blockquote&gt;

We reach them the same way we reach anyone searching for information on the web. We make the information available. The rest is up to them. If the information isn't available, they can't find it and that is what we can't allow to happen. 

Think about it. Yes, there are a lot of people that are not "online" in the same way we are but there are just as many that use the Internet as an information source when needed. My own sister is one of those. She does not spend a lot of time online but she does routinely look things up. If she was interested in an author, I'm sure she'd research that author. Don't fall into the stereotyping trap of thinking that all romance readers aren't computer uses just because they read romances now, ya hear. ;p

See where I'm going? Search engines are wonderful things. When I said that as a reader what I'd like to ultimately see was a complete listing of plagarized books by the authors who commented the offenses, I meant it. Quite literally. It might also be nice to make sure the publishers involved got mentioned somewhere in that listing, too. Just to see how many times they show up. 

And, yeah, we do have to forgive if someone is truly repentent, which means that future books could be published by an author who has "paid" for the offenses. That's always assuming, however, that they have repented and paid in some way. Personally, though, re-editing something that's already been tainted just doesn't do it for me as a reader. A clean start, a new work, yes. Reworking something already tainted? Not so much.

And second chances only go so far. Which is why keeping track and not forgetting is truly so important. Repentance only works if it's real, you know. Trust but verify ring any bells? 

Oh, and one other thing, there is a certain part of my brain that is really resistant to the very idea of having to define plagarism for people who make their living writing. It keeps telling me they should already know this information and if they don't I should be doubly insulted as a longtime devoted reader of their work. Just thought I should mention that in passing.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote><p>But how do we reach the vast majority of CE readers out there, to make them see that they have been buying what essentially amounts to stolen property, and convince them to stop? How can we reach them if not through the press?
</p></blockquote>
<p>We reach them the same way we reach anyone searching for information on the web. We make the information available. The rest is up to them. If the information isn&#8217;t available, they can&#8217;t find it and that is what we can&#8217;t allow to happen. </p>
<p>Think about it. Yes, there are a lot of people that are not &#8220;online&#8221; in the same way we are but there are just as many that use the Internet as an information source when needed. My own sister is one of those. She does not spend a lot of time online but she does routinely look things up. If she was interested in an author, I&#8217;m sure she&#8217;d research that author. Don&#8217;t fall into the stereotyping trap of thinking that all romance readers aren&#8217;t computer uses just because they read romances now, ya hear. ;p</p>
<p>See where I&#8217;m going? Search engines are wonderful things. When I said that as a reader what I&#8217;d like to ultimately see was a complete listing of plagarized books by the authors who commented the offenses, I meant it. Quite literally. It might also be nice to make sure the publishers involved got mentioned somewhere in that listing, too. Just to see how many times they show up. </p>
<p>And, yeah, we do have to forgive if someone is truly repentent, which means that future books could be published by an author who has &#8220;paid&#8221; for the offenses. That&#8217;s always assuming, however, that they have repented and paid in some way. Personally, though, re-editing something that&#8217;s already been tainted just doesn&#8217;t do it for me as a reader. A clean start, a new work, yes. Reworking something already tainted? Not so much.</p>
<p>And second chances only go so far. Which is why keeping track and not forgetting is truly so important. Repentance only works if it&#8217;s real, you know. Trust but verify ring any bells? </p>
<p>Oh, and one other thing, there is a certain part of my brain that is really resistant to the very idea of having to define plagarism for people who make their living writing. It keeps telling me they should already know this information and if they don&#8217;t I should be doubly insulted as a longtime devoted reader of their work. Just thought I should mention that in passing.</p>
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		<title>By: Shiloh Walker</title>
		<link>http://dearauthor.com/feeder/?FeederAction=clicked&amp;feed=Articles+%28RSS2%29&amp;seed=http%3A%2F%2Fdearauthor.com%2Fwordpress%2F2008%2F01%2F22%2Fdefining-the-meaning-of-plagiarism-for-the-fiction-community%2F&amp;seed_title=Defining+the+Meaning+of+Plagiarism+for+the+Fiction+Community/comment-page-2/#comment-126227</link>
		<dc:creator>Shiloh Walker</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 23 Jan 2008 19:25:51 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://dearauthor.com/wordpress/2008/01/22/defining-the-meaning-of-plagiarism-for-the-fiction-community/#comment-126227</guid>
		<description>&lt;blockquote&gt;If all you do is blast the offender on a blog, that’s something. But don’t just make nice and feel sorry for the plagiarizer who hasn’t yet admitted any wrongdoing–and may never do so without hedging the admission with excuses.&lt;/blockquote&gt;

Blasting doesn't accomplish anything, Poison Ivy.  Look... let me try to explain this way.  Bear with on the nursing context...nursing is what I know.

I'm going to relate this a ethic/moral type issue as well, but I am NOT drawing parallels~ just trying to illuminate how insults or blasting tend to have little to no effect.

Going to use a nurse who is trying to educate parents with young teens and preteens on the dangers and repercussions of teen sex and how education, open discussion and honestly is required.

 ~*~

&lt;em&gt; Nurse goes into the room, turns and faces the parents starts off with...&lt;/em&gt;


&lt;blockquote&gt;
If you haven't talked openly to your kids about sex, you're probably damning them a life of poverty, a life riddled with health problems stemming from STDs, a life where they are stuck in a job with little higher education. 

If you don't talk openly to your kids about sex, you're risking their health, their ability to have healthy children, ever their long term health.

If you aren't talking openly to your kids about sex, you're risking their lives. It isn't just about babies or HIV.  You can't just say don't have sex.  It's not good enough and if that's all you do, you've failed.
&lt;/blockquote&gt;



Sounds rather harsh, yes?  Is it wrong? Not necessarily.  These are all valid points, taken to the extreme, but valid.

HOWEVER...many of these parents are either going to turn off their ears, or they are going to get so offended, they don't hear what else she might have to say.  

They don't hear the important information about education, how kids don't always think oral sex IS sex, and this ignorance can lead to kids catching diseases like herpes.  

They don't hear about the fact that open and honest, non-judgmental discussion with kids can give their kid a chance at a better, healthier life.

~*~
Trying it from an educational standpoint...  same scenario, nurse going in to talk to parents on educating their kids.
~*~


&lt;em&gt; nurse goes into classroom and starts handing each of the parents a picture of a pretty girl, roughly 12-13 years old.  She then goes around and hands out a picture of the same girl, but her mouth is covered with ugly blisters and there are scars.&lt;/em&gt;


&lt;blockquote&gt;
This girl's parents talked to her about sex.  They explained that sex is something that should wait until she's older.

They explained that she needed to think about what was best for her and not to do anything just because her friends did, or because the boy she liked was pushing her to.   They had their birds &#38; bees talk, but they weren't comfortable being open about sexuality and all its aspects.

When her boyfriend told her that oral sex isn't really sex, she was too embarrassed to talk to her parents.  When she tried, she got the same birds and bees talk, and ended up so embarrassed, she never asked the questions she had to ask.

So she engaged in oral sex...thinking it wasn't really sex.  But her boyfriend had herpes.  And now she does, too.&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/blockquote&gt;

~*~

Which group of parents is going to listen better?

Nobody cares for being lectured or blasted.  Often, they turn their ears off or just nod along, thinking... man, this is a waste.

But people are willing to be educated.  Education comes from objectivity.  It doesn't come from blasting.  People can easily agree with blasts, but chances are, they did &lt;em&gt;that&lt;/em&gt; anyway.  

It's not reaching those who haven't made a decision or those who aren't aware.  And those are the ones we need to reach.

They key is in education and in open discussion, but if it's not objective, it's not going to have much effect.

I have no desire to make nice with CE but I can say I pity her.  She made a bad decision, seriously bad, and I wonder how much of that stemmed from some sort of desperation or ignorance.  Desperation and ignorance are definitely things I pity.  They don't excuse the acts, they don't make it better.  Acting out of desperation or ignorance is a sign of weakness.  I can't respect weakness.  I can't condone acting on it.  But I can pity it.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote><p>If all you do is blast the offender on a blog, that’s something. But don’t just make nice and feel sorry for the plagiarizer who hasn’t yet admitted any wrongdoing–and may never do so without hedging the admission with excuses.</p></blockquote>
<p>Blasting doesn&#8217;t accomplish anything, Poison Ivy.  Look&#8230; let me try to explain this way.  Bear with on the nursing context&#8230;nursing is what I know.</p>
<p>I&#8217;m going to relate this a ethic/moral type issue as well, but I am NOT drawing parallels~ just trying to illuminate how insults or blasting tend to have little to no effect.</p>
<p>Going to use a nurse who is trying to educate parents with young teens and preteens on the dangers and repercussions of teen sex and how education, open discussion and honestly is required.</p>
<p> ~*~</p>
<p><em> Nurse goes into the room, turns and faces the parents starts off with&#8230;</em></p>
<blockquote><p>
If you haven&#8217;t talked openly to your kids about sex, you&#8217;re probably damning them a life of poverty, a life riddled with health problems stemming from STDs, a life where they are stuck in a job with little higher education. </p>
<p>If you don&#8217;t talk openly to your kids about sex, you&#8217;re risking their health, their ability to have healthy children, ever their long term health.</p>
<p>If you aren&#8217;t talking openly to your kids about sex, you&#8217;re risking their lives. It isn&#8217;t just about babies or HIV.  You can&#8217;t just say don&#8217;t have sex.  It&#8217;s not good enough and if that&#8217;s all you do, you&#8217;ve failed.
</p></blockquote>
<p>Sounds rather harsh, yes?  Is it wrong? Not necessarily.  These are all valid points, taken to the extreme, but valid.</p>
<p>HOWEVER&#8230;many of these parents are either going to turn off their ears, or they are going to get so offended, they don&#8217;t hear what else she might have to say.  </p>
<p>They don&#8217;t hear the important information about education, how kids don&#8217;t always think oral sex IS sex, and this ignorance can lead to kids catching diseases like herpes.  </p>
<p>They don&#8217;t hear about the fact that open and honest, non-judgmental discussion with kids can give their kid a chance at a better, healthier life.</p>
<p>~*~<br />
Trying it from an educational standpoint&#8230;  same scenario, nurse going in to talk to parents on educating their kids.<br />
~*~</p>
<p><em> nurse goes into classroom and starts handing each of the parents a picture of a pretty girl, roughly 12-13 years old.  She then goes around and hands out a picture of the same girl, but her mouth is covered with ugly blisters and there are scars.</em></p>
<blockquote><p>
This girl&#8217;s parents talked to her about sex.  They explained that sex is something that should wait until she&#8217;s older.</p>
<p>They explained that she needed to think about what was best for her and not to do anything just because her friends did, or because the boy she liked was pushing her to.   They had their birds &amp; bees talk, but they weren&#8217;t comfortable being open about sexuality and all its aspects.</p>
<p>When her boyfriend told her that oral sex isn&#8217;t really sex, she was too embarrassed to talk to her parents.  When she tried, she got the same birds and bees talk, and ended up so embarrassed, she never asked the questions she had to ask.</p>
<p>So she engaged in oral sex&#8230;thinking it wasn&#8217;t really sex.  But her boyfriend had herpes.  And now she does, too.</p></blockquote>
<p>~*~</p>
<p>Which group of parents is going to listen better?</p>
<p>Nobody cares for being lectured or blasted.  Often, they turn their ears off or just nod along, thinking&#8230; man, this is a waste.</p>
<p>But people are willing to be educated.  Education comes from objectivity.  It doesn&#8217;t come from blasting.  People can easily agree with blasts, but chances are, they did <em>that</em> anyway.  </p>
<p>It&#8217;s not reaching those who haven&#8217;t made a decision or those who aren&#8217;t aware.  And those are the ones we need to reach.</p>
<p>They key is in education and in open discussion, but if it&#8217;s not objective, it&#8217;s not going to have much effect.</p>
<p>I have no desire to make nice with CE but I can say I pity her.  She made a bad decision, seriously bad, and I wonder how much of that stemmed from some sort of desperation or ignorance.  Desperation and ignorance are definitely things I pity.  They don&#8217;t excuse the acts, they don&#8217;t make it better.  Acting out of desperation or ignorance is a sign of weakness.  I can&#8217;t respect weakness.  I can&#8217;t condone acting on it.  But I can pity it.</p>
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