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	<title>Comments on: What Goes on on the Internet, Stays on the Internet?</title>
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	<description>Book reviews, industry news, and commentary from a reader's point of view</description>
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		<title>By: Jane</title>
		<link>http://dearauthor.com/feeder/?FeederAction=clicked&amp;feed=Articles+%28RSS2%29&amp;seed=http%3A%2F%2Fdearauthor.com%2Fwordpress%2F2006%2F07%2F08%2Fwhat-goes-on-on-the-internet-stays-on-the-internet%2F&amp;seed_title=What+Goes+on+on+the+Internet%2C+Stays+on+the+Internet%3F/comment-page-2/#comment-2169</link>
		<dc:creator>Jane</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 13 Jul 2006 19:21:52 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description>Sob.  I go away for a day and I miss the biggest romance author of all time posting on the blog.  Not that I think she&#039;ll be back, but how cool for dearauthor.  (I&#039;ll be posting a letter to Ms. Roberts this weekend for Angels Fall though, in case anyone *cough*  Roberts *cough*  might still be reading this thread).  And maybe I am just a raving liberal lunie at heart, but I have always respected Roberts after last year&#039;s RWA kerfluffle and this whole deal only increases my respect for her more.  

It&#039;s a bit ironic because about 8 years ago, I just could not get into Robert&#039;s writing.  I didn&#039;t understand what all the hoopla was about but I started reading JD Robb, then slowly the backlist of single titles and now I am buying her in hardcover.  At Costco and at a deeply discounted price, but I buy her in hardcover which is not something I can say about alot of other authors.

As for threads and apologies, I know what you are saying Kate R and I really don&#039;t know how to handle those things.  I think it is classy for someone to apologize and not classy to acknowledge the apology.  As the blog owner, I don&#039;t know if I should delete the original posts that led to the apology and then the apology or what.  I hate the idea of deletion. 

I did close the comments on some posts and so that is what I am going to do here.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Sob.  I go away for a day and I miss the biggest romance author of all time posting on the blog.  Not that I think she&#8217;ll be back, but how cool for dearauthor.  (I&#8217;ll be posting a letter to Ms. Roberts this weekend for Angels Fall though, in case anyone *cough*  Roberts *cough*  might still be reading this thread).  And maybe I am just a raving liberal lunie at heart, but I have always respected Roberts after last year&#8217;s RWA kerfluffle and this whole deal only increases my respect for her more.  </p>
<p>It&#8217;s a bit ironic because about 8 years ago, I just could not get into Robert&#8217;s writing.  I didn&#8217;t understand what all the hoopla was about but I started reading JD Robb, then slowly the backlist of single titles and now I am buying her in hardcover.  At Costco and at a deeply discounted price, but I buy her in hardcover which is not something I can say about alot of other authors.</p>
<p>As for threads and apologies, I know what you are saying Kate R and I really don&#8217;t know how to handle those things.  I think it is classy for someone to apologize and not classy to acknowledge the apology.  As the blog owner, I don&#8217;t know if I should delete the original posts that led to the apology and then the apology or what.  I hate the idea of deletion. </p>
<p>I did close the comments on some posts and so that is what I am going to do here.</p>
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		<title>By: Nora Roberts</title>
		<link>http://dearauthor.com/feeder/?FeederAction=clicked&amp;feed=Articles+%28RSS2%29&amp;seed=http%3A%2F%2Fdearauthor.com%2Fwordpress%2F2006%2F07%2F08%2Fwhat-goes-on-on-the-internet-stays-on-the-internet%2F&amp;seed_title=What+Goes+on+on+the+Internet%2C+Stays+on+the+Internet%3F/comment-page-2/#comment-2167</link>
		<dc:creator>Nora Roberts</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 13 Jul 2006 17:25:08 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description>&lt;/blockquote&gt;


Thanks, and accepted.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Thanks, and accepted.</p>
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		<title>By: lurker1</title>
		<link>http://dearauthor.com/feeder/?FeederAction=clicked&amp;feed=Articles+%28RSS2%29&amp;seed=http%3A%2F%2Fdearauthor.com%2Fwordpress%2F2006%2F07%2F08%2Fwhat-goes-on-on-the-internet-stays-on-the-internet%2F&amp;seed_title=What+Goes+on+on+the+Internet%2C+Stays+on+the+Internet%3F/comment-page-2/#comment-2166</link>
		<dc:creator>lurker1</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 13 Jul 2006 17:15:28 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description>Karen Scott, you don&#039;t like George Washington?  I knew the Brits had long memories, but sheesh!</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Karen Scott, you don&#8217;t like George Washington?  I knew the Brits had long memories, but sheesh!</p>
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		<title>By: Karen Scott</title>
		<link>http://dearauthor.com/feeder/?FeederAction=clicked&amp;feed=Articles+%28RSS2%29&amp;seed=http%3A%2F%2Fdearauthor.com%2Fwordpress%2F2006%2F07%2F08%2Fwhat-goes-on-on-the-internet-stays-on-the-internet%2F&amp;seed_title=What+Goes+on+on+the+Internet%2C+Stays+on+the+Internet%3F/comment-page-2/#comment-2165</link>
		<dc:creator>Karen Scott</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 13 Jul 2006 17:07:29 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://dearauthor.com/wordpress/2006/07/08/what-goes-on-on-the-internet-stays-on-the-internet/#comment-2165</guid>
		<description>&lt;blockquote&gt;Ask poor George W or Bill Schaefer. &lt;/blockquote&gt;

Poor George W?   Sorry, I just spat my coffee out just reading that bit.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<blockquote><p>Ask poor George W or Bill Schaefer. </p></blockquote>
<p>Poor George W?   Sorry, I just spat my coffee out just reading that bit.</p>
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		<title>By: lurker1</title>
		<link>http://dearauthor.com/feeder/?FeederAction=clicked&amp;feed=Articles+%28RSS2%29&amp;seed=http%3A%2F%2Fdearauthor.com%2Fwordpress%2F2006%2F07%2F08%2Fwhat-goes-on-on-the-internet-stays-on-the-internet%2F&amp;seed_title=What+Goes+on+on+the+Internet%2C+Stays+on+the+Internet%3F/comment-page-2/#comment-2163</link>
		<dc:creator>lurker1</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 13 Jul 2006 16:17:51 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://dearauthor.com/wordpress/2006/07/08/what-goes-on-on-the-internet-stays-on-the-internet/#comment-2163</guid>
		<description>Well darn!  I&#039;m going to have to eat some more words (one of the reasons I have such a time staying out of those &quot;women&#039;s sizes&quot;).  Everyone I&#039;ve met who knows NR personally has said she&#039;s (you&#039;re) a nice lady.  OK.  So now I&#039;ll stop rolling my eyes and accept that PMS and/or red hair were at work.  And, BTW, I&#039;m impressed that there was a public apology (which I missed).

One of the problems with being a public figure--even in the limited environs of the romance world--is that you&#039;re not allowed the same leeway in terms of free expression be it merely misspoken or purposeful.  Ask poor George W or Bill Schaefer. And this is not directly related, but sort of the same thing.  This reminds me of Pat Oliphant&#039;s absolute rule about never meeting any politician because he&#039;d once met Barry Goldwater and liked him so much personally, he could never again use him as a subject.  

Anyway, it was nice that you took the time to set the record straight.  I&#039;ve always admired that sort of forthrightness and acceptance of responsibility.  Consequently, I shall also apologize for bringing up an incident long past and obviously deeply regretted.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Well darn!  I&#8217;m going to have to eat some more words (one of the reasons I have such a time staying out of those &#8220;women&#8217;s sizes&#8221;).  Everyone I&#8217;ve met who knows NR personally has said she&#8217;s (you&#8217;re) a nice lady.  OK.  So now I&#8217;ll stop rolling my eyes and accept that PMS and/or red hair were at work.  And, BTW, I&#8217;m impressed that there was a public apology (which I missed).</p>
<p>One of the problems with being a public figure&#8211;even in the limited environs of the romance world&#8211;is that you&#8217;re not allowed the same leeway in terms of free expression be it merely misspoken or purposeful.  Ask poor George W or Bill Schaefer. And this is not directly related, but sort of the same thing.  This reminds me of Pat Oliphant&#8217;s absolute rule about never meeting any politician because he&#8217;d once met Barry Goldwater and liked him so much personally, he could never again use him as a subject.  </p>
<p>Anyway, it was nice that you took the time to set the record straight.  I&#8217;ve always admired that sort of forthrightness and acceptance of responsibility.  Consequently, I shall also apologize for bringing up an incident long past and obviously deeply regretted.</p>
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		<title>By: Chelle</title>
		<link>http://dearauthor.com/feeder/?FeederAction=clicked&amp;feed=Articles+%28RSS2%29&amp;seed=http%3A%2F%2Fdearauthor.com%2Fwordpress%2F2006%2F07%2F08%2Fwhat-goes-on-on-the-internet-stays-on-the-internet%2F&amp;seed_title=What+Goes+on+on+the+Internet%2C+Stays+on+the+Internet%3F/comment-page-2/#comment-2162</link>
		<dc:creator>Chelle</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 13 Jul 2006 15:59:59 +0000</pubDate>
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		<description>[quote comment=&quot;2161&quot;]...and I&#039;m beginning to feel like a Chelle fangirl because once again, she said it better ...[/quote]
Awww, now you&#039;re gonna get yer own &quot;sweet&quot; label.

Were you channeling POTC as well? Do you not worship the deliciousness that is Depp? Do you not want to lick his...um, I&#039;m digressing. Rein it back in, girl.

Perfect control has been achieved. Moving on.

Perhaps we need a Congressional Committee to oversee the statute of limitations on how fricking long you can hold something against someone, apology or no. 

The Apology Police? 

The Grand Czar of Genuine Remorse (borrowing from kate there and giving credit where credit is due) or perhaps the Goddess of Abject Regret? 

OK, that last one was over the top, but that&#039;s what I&#039;d want to be called.

Apologies should always be sincere. They should always be heartfelt. And they should always be met with a response, whether it be &quot;EFF U, YA BITCH!!!&quot; (which is just plain trashy &amp; ungracious...and my mama would box my ears for that), &quot;Thanks. I&#039;ll never trust/talk to/read you again, but thanks for attempting to make it right.&quot;, or &quot;You know, that was cool of you to regret what you did. I forgive you and won&#039;t bring it up again&quot;. 

Because true forgiveness moves on and treats you like it never happened.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>[quote comment="2161"]&#8230;and I&#8217;m beginning to feel like a Chelle fangirl because once again, she said it better &#8230;[/quote]<br />
Awww, now you&#8217;re gonna get yer own &#8220;sweet&#8221; label.</p>
<p>Were you channeling POTC as well? Do you not worship the deliciousness that is Depp? Do you not want to lick his&#8230;um, I&#8217;m digressing. Rein it back in, girl.</p>
<p>Perfect control has been achieved. Moving on.</p>
<p>Perhaps we need a Congressional Committee to oversee the statute of limitations on how fricking long you can hold something against someone, apology or no. </p>
<p>The Apology Police? </p>
<p>The Grand Czar of Genuine Remorse (borrowing from kate there and giving credit where credit is due) or perhaps the Goddess of Abject Regret? </p>
<p>OK, that last one was over the top, but that&#8217;s what I&#8217;d want to be called.</p>
<p>Apologies should always be sincere. They should always be heartfelt. And they should always be met with a response, whether it be &#8220;EFF U, YA BITCH!!!&#8221; (which is just plain trashy &amp; ungracious&#8230;and my mama would box my ears for that), &#8220;Thanks. I&#8217;ll never trust/talk to/read you again, but thanks for attempting to make it right.&#8221;, or &#8220;You know, that was cool of you to regret what you did. I forgive you and won&#8217;t bring it up again&#8221;. </p>
<p>Because true forgiveness moves on and treats you like it never happened.</p>
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		<title>By: kate r</title>
		<link>http://dearauthor.com/feeder/?FeederAction=clicked&amp;feed=Articles+%28RSS2%29&amp;seed=http%3A%2F%2Fdearauthor.com%2Fwordpress%2F2006%2F07%2F08%2Fwhat-goes-on-on-the-internet-stays-on-the-internet%2F&amp;seed_title=What+Goes+on+on+the+Internet%2C+Stays+on+the+Internet%3F/comment-page-2/#comment-2161</link>
		<dc:creator>kate r</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 13 Jul 2006 15:40:27 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://dearauthor.com/wordpress/2006/07/08/what-goes-on-on-the-internet-stays-on-the-internet/#comment-2161</guid>
		<description>gesundheit, I mean. 
and I&#039;m beginning to feel like a Chelle fangirl because once again, she said it better (and at the same time). arrr, ya Bitch.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>gesundheit, I mean.<br />
and I&#8217;m beginning to feel like a Chelle fangirl because once again, she said it better (and at the same time). arrr, ya Bitch.</p>
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		<title>By: kate r</title>
		<link>http://dearauthor.com/feeder/?FeederAction=clicked&amp;feed=Articles+%28RSS2%29&amp;seed=http%3A%2F%2Fdearauthor.com%2Fwordpress%2F2006%2F07%2F08%2Fwhat-goes-on-on-the-internet-stays-on-the-internet%2F&amp;seed_title=What+Goes+on+on+the+Internet%2C+Stays+on+the+Internet%3F/comment-page-2/#comment-2160</link>
		<dc:creator>kate r</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 13 Jul 2006 15:37:33 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://dearauthor.com/wordpress/2006/07/08/what-goes-on-on-the-internet-stays-on-the-internet/#comment-2160</guid>
		<description>Yet another life adjustment to figure out thanks to the internet and message boards: There has to be a statute of limitations on dredging up stupid remarks made in the heat of the moment.

Maybe someone can be elected the Grand Czar of apologies. You list your apology with the person (or a whole bureau perhaps) and if it&#039;s accepted as sincere regret, no one may bring up your asinine behavior again. 

It&#039;s happened here--that a person apologized sincerely and there&#039;s no response. It&#039;s worse than a sneeze with no &quot;gesunheit&quot; and almost as bad as when a stranger trips and falls and no passersby stop. That&#039;s &lt;a href=&quot;http://katerothwell.blogspot.com/2006/07/sbd-delayed-adolescence-catching-up.html&quot; rel=&quot;nofollow&quot;&gt;why I posted this. &lt;/a&gt; (The bit at the end of the longish post)</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Yet another life adjustment to figure out thanks to the internet and message boards: There has to be a statute of limitations on dredging up stupid remarks made in the heat of the moment.</p>
<p>Maybe someone can be elected the Grand Czar of apologies. You list your apology with the person (or a whole bureau perhaps) and if it&#8217;s accepted as sincere regret, no one may bring up your asinine behavior again. </p>
<p>It&#8217;s happened here&#8211;that a person apologized sincerely and there&#8217;s no response. It&#8217;s worse than a sneeze with no &#8220;gesunheit&#8221; and almost as bad as when a stranger trips and falls and no passersby stop. That&#8217;s <a href="http://katerothwell.blogspot.com/2006/07/sbd-delayed-adolescence-catching-up.html" rel="nofollow">why I posted this. </a> (The bit at the end of the longish post)</p>
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		<title>By: Chelle</title>
		<link>http://dearauthor.com/feeder/?FeederAction=clicked&amp;feed=Articles+%28RSS2%29&amp;seed=http%3A%2F%2Fdearauthor.com%2Fwordpress%2F2006%2F07%2F08%2Fwhat-goes-on-on-the-internet-stays-on-the-internet%2F&amp;seed_title=What+Goes+on+on+the+Internet%2C+Stays+on+the+Internet%3F/comment-page-1/#comment-2159</link>
		<dc:creator>Chelle</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 13 Jul 2006 15:27:36 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://dearauthor.com/wordpress/2006/07/08/what-goes-on-on-the-internet-stays-on-the-internet/#comment-2159</guid>
		<description>See...sweet! Albeit red-haired and blessed with the temperment that goes along with said hair color. Seriously, no matter what you think of Nora, her books, or her characters, you&#039;ve gotta a respect a woman who consistently churns out quality, entertaining fiction that bounces from achingly poignant to gut-bustingly hilarious in the flicker of an eyelash.

[quote comment=&quot;2154&quot;]Nora and her gang of cutthroats...[/quote]
What&#039;s this? A bad POTC reference? Ayyyyye, me mateys, therrrre be pirrrrrrrrrrrrrates in dem dere waters!

Seriously, this just proves my point. We&#039;re human. We all lose it on occasion. We all reach that place where sense is overpowered by _____ (pick one: temper, PMS, general snarkiness, etc.). We all have life experiences, i.e. certain things that push our buttons, chap our collective asses and fire our passions. Even best-selling authors. Have you situations in your life that you wish came with a &quot;re-do&quot; or &quot;delete&quot; function? Of course.

IMHO, that doesn&#039;t make anyone a horrid person. It just means that we don&#039;t have exquisite control all of the time.

In the words of someone much better with them than I am:
&lt;em&gt;If you prick us, do we not bleed? If you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you poison us, do we not die? And if you wrong us, shall we not revenge? If we are like you in the rest, we will resemble you in that.&lt;/em&gt;

In the end, we all resemble each other in that respect, dislike it as we may.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>See&#8230;sweet! Albeit red-haired and blessed with the temperment that goes along with said hair color. Seriously, no matter what you think of Nora, her books, or her characters, you&#8217;ve gotta a respect a woman who consistently churns out quality, entertaining fiction that bounces from achingly poignant to gut-bustingly hilarious in the flicker of an eyelash.</p>
<p>[quote comment="2154"]Nora and her gang of cutthroats&#8230;[/quote]<br />
What&#8217;s this? A bad POTC reference? Ayyyyye, me mateys, therrrre be pirrrrrrrrrrrrrates in dem dere waters!</p>
<p>Seriously, this just proves my point. We&#8217;re human. We all lose it on occasion. We all reach that place where sense is overpowered by _____ (pick one: temper, PMS, general snarkiness, etc.). We all have life experiences, i.e. certain things that push our buttons, chap our collective asses and fire our passions. Even best-selling authors. Have you situations in your life that you wish came with a &#8220;re-do&#8221; or &#8220;delete&#8221; function? Of course.</p>
<p>IMHO, that doesn&#8217;t make anyone a horrid person. It just means that we don&#8217;t have exquisite control all of the time.</p>
<p>In the words of someone much better with them than I am:<br />
<em>If you prick us, do we not bleed? If you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you poison us, do we not die? And if you wrong us, shall we not revenge? If we are like you in the rest, we will resemble you in that.</em></p>
<p>In the end, we all resemble each other in that respect, dislike it as we may.</p>
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		<title>By: Nora Roberts</title>
		<link>http://dearauthor.com/feeder/?FeederAction=clicked&amp;feed=Articles+%28RSS2%29&amp;seed=http%3A%2F%2Fdearauthor.com%2Fwordpress%2F2006%2F07%2F08%2Fwhat-goes-on-on-the-internet-stays-on-the-internet%2F&amp;seed_title=What+Goes+on+on+the+Internet%2C+Stays+on+the+Internet%3F/comment-page-1/#comment-2157</link>
		<dc:creator>Nora Roberts</dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Thu, 13 Jul 2006 14:54:34 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://dearauthor.com/wordpress/2006/07/08/what-goes-on-on-the-internet-stays-on-the-internet/#comment-2157</guid>
		<description>I do regret the incident from several years ago. I regretted it enough at the time to apologize publically on the message board where it began, to copy that apology onto the ADWOFF board, and I apologized privately to the owner of the initial board. While I felt provoked--particulary as the reader sent me several vicious and raging e-mails--my behavior was unquestionably poor. However, if an incident from long ago is to be brought up, perhaps it would be fair to also have noted that I apologized.

I don&#039;t remember attacking anyone else, or what those circumstances might be. 

In this case, however, whatever the circumstances, I regret, very much, I didn&#039;t show more restraint, and more class. I certainly learned a valuable lesson from it--never to post when in full temper. Never. 

Oh, and if I ever called myself queen of anything, it would&#039;ve been in jest.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I do regret the incident from several years ago. I regretted it enough at the time to apologize publically on the message board where it began, to copy that apology onto the ADWOFF board, and I apologized privately to the owner of the initial board. While I felt provoked&#8211;particulary as the reader sent me several vicious and raging e-mails&#8211;my behavior was unquestionably poor. However, if an incident from long ago is to be brought up, perhaps it would be fair to also have noted that I apologized.</p>
<p>I don&#8217;t remember attacking anyone else, or what those circumstances might be. </p>
<p>In this case, however, whatever the circumstances, I regret, very much, I didn&#8217;t show more restraint, and more class. I certainly learned a valuable lesson from it&#8211;never to post when in full temper. Never. </p>
<p>Oh, and if I ever called myself queen of anything, it would&#8217;ve been in jest.</p>
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