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Dear Author

Depresshun Got You Down? Try The Unfeasibly Tall Greek Billionaire’s...

Had it up to here with crap from Amazon? Have the Monday morning blues? Your co-workers pissing you off more than normal? Take refuge in the brilliant author interviews at authortalk.wordpress.com.

Or read the serial, The Unfeasibly Tall Greek Billionaires’ Blackmailed Martyr-Complex Secretary Mistress Bride.

Excerpt:

Nico laughed and the slurping started again. It was several minutes before Nico spoke.
“I’ve got to go, Sasha” he drawled. “I need to be at the airport in thirty minutes. I’m flying to Athens in my luxury private jet for a global hummus conference. “
“Oh Nico!” Sasha pouted. “Well, call me as soon as you get back.”
The click-clack of stiletto heels told Molly that Sasha had left, but she had no intention of turning round. She wouldn’t be able to stand the self-satisfied smile on Nico’s face.
She typed on, frowning with concentration. She was trying to complete a pie chart illustrating global hummus consumption patterns when Nico drew her earphones off and whispered in her ear, “Well, Miss Ordinary, have you finished typing up my talk yet?”
His hot breath on her ear made her jump. She hadn’t realised he had gotten so close. To her consternation, Molly’s nipples hardened. She didn’t dare look round. Instead she stared at the pie chart. Did they really eat that much hummus in Austria? It seemed a lot.

These are the rules:-

1. Each chapter will be posted on the blog of that chapter’s author (if wished), and here at my place. Each chapter will appear on a weekly basis (though not necessarily exactly 7 days after the last one)

2. Each chapter must contain a minimum of three elements from the title. For example, chapter 1 establishes *unfeasibly tall*, *greek billionaire*, *martyr-complex* and *secretary*.

3. Max 750 words per chapter. (Vague story outline set out after chapter 1).

4. Pastiche category-romance feel please. No surprise vampires.

5. You get one point for every time:

- Molly indulges her martyr complex
- Nico mentions his belief that Molly’s a whore
- Nico cuts Molly off mid-sentence
- You make a reference to the global hummus industry

6. You get ten points for every time you use one of the following phrases

- To her consternation, Molly’s nipples hardened
- What was the point? Nico never believed her!
- He came, roaring his pleasure

The current serial is all full, but clearly there is room for the sequel, right?

Speaking of Harlequin series books, I’ve really fallen down on the Harlequin team challenge thing. Does anyone want to coordinate that for us? Email me if you are really glutton for punishment.

Dear Author

Harlequin Makes a Call for Paranormal Shorts

I think this is old news but Harlequin is seeking authors to submit short stories (10,000-15,000 words) for electronic publication under the Nocturne Bites line. You can submit your manuscript online to [email protected]