Dear Ms. Milan:
Thank you for your correspondence of April 1, 2009, raising concerns regarding your clients’ purported ownership of the trademarks Werestagâ„¢ and Weredeerâ„¢. You claim that we are engaged in action that will inappropriately dilute and confuse the consuming public over the use of the mark “WereDeer” in conjunction with the sale of DEER LICK SEASON and its accompanying sequels by Ann Aguirre to Malle Vallik.
Unfortunately, I fear that your clients may have mislead you regarding the facts of the situation. First, as you know, trademarks are only given protection if they are registered. I find no registration for said marks. Further, these marks your clients purport to maintain are descriptive marks and as such are only entitled to protection if they have acquired a secondary meaning.
As Werestag and Weredeer are merely useful terms in describing the underlying product, that is, stories featuring shapeshifting four legged beasts having “four chambered stomachs with or without prongs” as you so aptly describe them. Allowing your clients the exclusive rights to these terms would confer an unfair advantage.
Given that these terms have no secondary meaning, serve only to describe the underlying product, and lack actual registration, your claims must fail. In other words, you can suck it.
Dear Author Literary Agency, part of the D.A.M.N.