May 2 2006
Dear Ms. Dane:
I think that Ja(y)ne and my foolish hope was we could write good reviews for all the books we choose. Yours was the first one that I picked. Your promo promised me a “smart heroine, alpha hero who isn't a bossy jerk. Funny dialog, hot secks. Oh and the werewolf mafia too.” In fairness to you, all those things were present: a strong smart mouthed heroine, hot sex, and a paranormal setup. And you got a pretty good cover although I wasn’t quite sure what was going on below the waist (behind the text).
Nina is a reformed hacker who runs a florist shop. Her brother was infected with the lycanthropy virus a couple of years ago. He was assimilated into the Pack at a very low level but somehow gained knowledge of a dangerous conspiracy that would affect the Pack. He was shot in the head in front of Nina. Nina is then taken into protective custody by the Pack, specifically the Pack’s Enforcer, Lex. Lex recognizes that Nina is his mate and hurries to claim her. The problem was that the book was so rushed. The two main characters went from barely meeting to in love in a matter of pages and the way in which love was expressed is my least favorite. It was in the words of the heroine the result of “magical cum.” Meaning that they were in love because of some magical bond that occurred when Lex claimed Nina rather than any personal connection.
Many aspects were overdone. Every character had to have a multitude of talents. I.e., the heroine was one of the finest hackers out there but she was also very artistic and loved floral arrangements. The hero is the fiercest warrior in the Pack but he was very creative and was now an architect of the finest homes. The Alpha of the Pack was this awesome chef. What is wrong with just having one skill? The heroine had a smart mouth and her comments were quite funny at times, but like other aspects of the book, this character trait was taken too far. The first time she made up some name like “Rushy McRushter” when Lex wanted them to get married after having sex for the first time, it was funny. But the next three times she made up new names? Not so much.
I know it is hard to write sex scenes but I read the words “mewling” and “inexorable” enough that I thought I was reading the same love scene and had to check my page numbers.
The sad thing about this book was that you had real interesting conflicts: Lex changing Nina without her understanding of the consequences of her actions; Nina’s fight with a Pack member without the aid of Lex or Cade and the sense of betrayal; the loss of her brother at the hands of the Pack. Unfortunately, those things were not given much of any attention. Nina forgives each action too quickly for the conflict to be real. The parts of this book are greater than its sum. If the book was about 100 pages longer and fleshed out some of those conflicts, it could have been a keeper.
I have to give you a C-. I’d be interested in reading you again but this one didn’t work for me.