REVIEW: Mistral’s Kiss by Laurell K Hamilton
Dear Ms. Hamilton:
Other than really funny (albeit unintentionally so) excerpts from your blog, I haven’t read anything by you in a year. Unlike other readers who can’t quit you, I have weaned myself off the Anita series. I haven’t read the last two books. This is quite an accomplishment for me. Unfortunately, despite my desire to free myself from your clutches entirely particularly given that the Merry Gentry series is now expanded to 15 books and not the original 8, I am still a helpless fly on your terrible, sperm covered web which is why in a weak ebook shopping moment, I bought Mistral’s Kiss in ebook format. damn that one click shopping anyway.
This book has no plot and consists of four episodes or scenes, three of which are sex scenes. I read that you couldn’t figure out what genre you were writing in. It’s erotica. E-R-O-T-I-C-A. It’s not, as you put it, “more like hard-boiled mysteries, or horror novels in tone of writing, but the romance and the magic … there, too.” Say it with me, erotica. See, a mystery requires some sleuthing. Horror novels generally aren’t filled with everyone’s spunk everywhere. Romance really doesn’t come into play when the main character is having public sex with all of her hot bodyguards standing around. There is lots of magic because I can’t quite figure out how Merry can walk after her continuous bouts of sex.
Because there is no plot, the book is short, and the entirety of the story takes place over less than a day, I hardly know what to write as a synopsis. Let’s see the timeline goes as follows: Merry wakes up in bed with some of her men. Another lost artifact appears. Gives all of her people more power. Aunt Andais is not happy, but like all of the evils in your books, she’s emasculated (I think this is a masculine adjective, but don’t know what the feminine counterpart is). Andais lets Merry do everything that Merry wants. Merry goes on to have sex with Abeloec, Mistral, and one other character. There is a run in with Sholto. Something paranormal ensues. It’s easily resolved. Everyone is happy.
This “book” (and I use that term loosely and defined as words bound and sold with a cover from a NY publisher) is nothing more than a series of scenes. It cannot work as a stand alone novel. It has virtually no relation to the previous book (i.e., what happened with the accusation against Rhys of raping the Seelie woman? Or the ball that Taranis is holding? or anything). It has no resolution. No crescendo and denouement unless we can count each orgasm as a mini story. It’s short. My Silhouette Nocture ebooks had about the same length as Mistral’s Kiss ebook.
The saving grace is that there are tender moments between Frost and Merry and Doyle and Merry which almost makes it worthwhile. What am I saying? Of course, paying $17.95 for this pap isn’t worthwhile unless the reader is a sick addict. I don’t really have any confidence that you won’t totally ruin Doyle’s character as you have Jean Claude and Richard and kind of Frost. I’m putting in a spoiler here just in case others have been successful in the LKH 12 step recovery program.