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Depresshun Got You Down? Try The Unfeasibly Tall Greek Billionaire’s...

Had it up to here with crap from Amazon? Have the Monday morning blues? Your co-workers pissing you off more than normal? Take refuge in the brilliant author interviews at authortalk.wordpress.com.

Or read the serial, The Unfeasibly Tall Greek Billionaires’ Blackmailed Martyr-Complex Secretary Mistress Bride.

Excerpt:

Nico laughed and the slurping started again. It was several minutes before Nico spoke.
“I’ve got to go, Sasha” he drawled. “I need to be at the airport in thirty minutes. I’m flying to Athens in my luxury private jet for a global hummus conference. “
“Oh Nico!” Sasha pouted. “Well, call me as soon as you get back.”
The click-clack of stiletto heels told Molly that Sasha had left, but she had no intention of turning round. She wouldn’t be able to stand the self-satisfied smile on Nico’s face.
She typed on, frowning with concentration. She was trying to complete a pie chart illustrating global hummus consumption patterns when Nico drew her earphones off and whispered in her ear, “Well, Miss Ordinary, have you finished typing up my talk yet?”
His hot breath on her ear made her jump. She hadn’t realised he had gotten so close. To her consternation, Molly’s nipples hardened. She didn’t dare look round. Instead she stared at the pie chart. Did they really eat that much hummus in Austria? It seemed a lot.

These are the rules:-

1. Each chapter will be posted on the blog of that chapter’s author (if wished), and here at my place. Each chapter will appear on a weekly basis (though not necessarily exactly 7 days after the last one)

2. Each chapter must contain a minimum of three elements from the title. For example, chapter 1 establishes *unfeasibly tall*, *greek billionaire*, *martyr-complex* and *secretary*.

3. Max 750 words per chapter. (Vague story outline set out after chapter 1).

4. Pastiche category-romance feel please. No surprise vampires.

5. You get one point for every time:

- Molly indulges her martyr complex
- Nico mentions his belief that Molly’s a whore
- Nico cuts Molly off mid-sentence
- You make a reference to the global hummus industry

6. You get ten points for every time you use one of the following phrases

- To her consternation, Molly’s nipples hardened
- What was the point? Nico never believed her!
- He came, roaring his pleasure

The current serial is all full, but clearly there is room for the sequel, right?

Speaking of Harlequin series books, I’ve really fallen down on the Harlequin team challenge thing. Does anyone want to coordinate that for us? Email me if you are really glutton for punishment.

Jane Litte is the founder of Dear Author, a lawyer, and a lover of pencil skirts. She spends her downtime reading romances and writing about them. Her TBR pile is much larger than the one shown in the picture and not as pretty. You can reach Jane by email at jane @ dearauthor dot com

18 Comments

  1. Ciar Cullen
    Apr 14, 2008 @ 12:57:42

    Really disappointed in the whole hummus thing. It’s not very Greek to me. You could have picked, say, feta or dolmathes. Hummus does have a nice slurpy feel, though. Maybe SBTB will do feta.

    ReplyReply

  2. Ann Aguirre
    Apr 14, 2008 @ 13:25:16

    Tumperkin is a genius, and I think the chapters have been hilariously good.

    ReplyReply

  3. Kirsten
    Apr 14, 2008 @ 13:54:29

    Why didn’t “virgin” make it into the title? Or “pregnancy” or “virgin pregnancy”????

    ReplyReply

  4. sula
    Apr 14, 2008 @ 13:59:21

    Happy to see this amazing new serial getting the praise and peer respect that it deserves. heh. T is a freaking genius and each chapter has been completely gut-busting funny so far.

    ReplyReply

  5. ilona andrews
    Apr 14, 2008 @ 14:12:26

    :dies:

    ReplyReply

  6. Ann Bruce
    Apr 14, 2008 @ 14:18:05

    Okay, where do I sign up?

    ReplyReply

  7. Shiloh Walker
    Apr 14, 2008 @ 14:22:10

    Oh, man Tumperkin is doing this?

    Heh. Definite entertainment here.

    ReplyReply

  8. Carrie Lofty
    Apr 14, 2008 @ 14:31:08

    Chapter Four will be at my place on Thursday, then Chapter Five on Ann Aguirre’s blog on Sunday. You can catch up on the story by reading chapters one (Tumperkin), two (Carolyn Jean), and three (Kate Rothwell).

    Maybe virgin pregnancies with feta could be the sequel…?

    ReplyReply

  9. Jane
    Apr 14, 2008 @ 14:36:26

    We definitely need to be doing sequels or tie ins. We have some ideas but need to check it out with the original creator and others. Stay tuned . . . .

    ReplyReply

  10. SandyO
    Apr 14, 2008 @ 14:58:31

    pregnant virgin? no wonder Nico never believes her.

    ReplyReply

  11. Shay
    Apr 14, 2008 @ 15:36:21

    Ooh…

    To my consternation, my nipples are hardening at the thought of the Unfeasibly Tall fan fic that could spin off of this.

    ReplyReply

  12. Jill Sorenson
    Apr 14, 2008 @ 16:17:15

    Ooh, I love unfeasibly tall men! They remind me of my husband.

    ReplyReply

  13. Jill Myles
    Apr 14, 2008 @ 16:59:56

    Sign me up!

    ReplyReply

  14. katiebabs
    Apr 14, 2008 @ 19:35:55

    This is great fun! I can’t stop laughing :)

    ReplyReply

  15. Tumperkin
    Apr 15, 2008 @ 02:50:01

    Thanks for the pimpage Jane! I am on the edge of my seat waiting for Carrie’s chapter 4 – it’s the Big Mis chapter and it’s going to be knicker-wettingly good.

    There is a definite possibility of sequels….

    ReplyReply

  16. Lorelie
    Apr 15, 2008 @ 07:22:47

    If there’s a sequel, I totally want in.

    ReplyReply

  17. carolyn Jean
    Apr 15, 2008 @ 08:04:40

    This was way too much fun. I can’t wait to find out what the Big Mis will be, either. And Tumperkin’s structure is keeping things nicely coherent and on track without being confining. Not to mention, providing an excuse for invoking repeated nipple hardening and roaring pleasure, which has helped make this serial SO steamy!

    ReplyReply

  18. minwai
    Jun 14, 2008 @ 02:14:12

    Light may be important for human. However, dark can die.

    ReplyReply

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