The rules for Author Promo Night Open Thread are as follows:

The book has to be released in that month (i.e., anything released during the last week of February would be a March release)
You can post for yourself or you can have a friend post for you if the idea of posting about your book paralyzes you .
No self published authors unless you write romance. No, I am not a POD hater, I am just thinking about the manageability of the thread.
Think about the readership. I.e., does your non fiction book about psoriasis really fit?
This one is more of a guideline than a rule, but be smart about your comment because if it is just a link to your website and the title of your book, I doubt you are going to get any interest.
DA reserves the right to delete the post if it promotes objectionable content (i.e., no daddy/daughter incest recommends are going to be allowed. Sorry.)
That’s it. Post away.

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Related posts:

1. Open Thread for Readers for June 2011
2. Open Thread for Readers for May 2012
3. Open Thread for Readers for March 2012

“Lucy Martin’s dream of marrying her Prince Charming might have fallen apart, but she’s determined to make her soccer-mad nephew’s dreams come true. But that means asking her old crush Ryland James, the legendary bad boy of soccer, to coach her nephew’s team.

Injured and ordered to polish his tarnished reputation, Ryland’s looking for distraction. Coaching might be more involvement than he likes, but with gorgeous Lucy offering cookies as a bribe he can’t resist! This soccer superstar might have met his perfect match…if he can convince the once-burnt, twice-wary Lucy to get back in the game….”

Dear Ms. McClone,

This book turned out to be more than the cute, sassy read I thought I’d get based on the book blurb. But that’s not to say that I liked what I got instead of what I thought I’d get. There are some things hinted at early in the book that turned out not to have a great deal of impact on the story or the characters. Plus the first half was filled with lusting while the romance of the second half felt rushed and unfulfilled. I also had issues with how involved I felt with Lucy and Ryland.

In the introduction to the book, I discovered that the heroine is a liver transplant recipient and you talk about how you went to lengths to find someone to talk to so this would all be correct but…except for a few passing comments about how this made heroine so ill as a child, there is almost no current inclusion about how it affects her life now – and I imagine that it would if only in how many anti-rejections meds she has to take. Perhaps it was a matter of not having enough space to include details but I had initially been excited at the thought of reading about such a heroine.

Ryland comes from poor background and was teased and bullied over it. When he returns to town and begins to coach, you say that he notices some of the people who did this are now parents watching their children play on the Defeeters but honestly this doesn’t seem to still affect him much – to the point that it’s almost like you went to a hero checklist and ticked off this item to add to the book to act as a quick background shading like hair color or height. He also says he’s already earned so much money that he doesn’t feel the drive to make tons more which doesn’t seem quite right an attitude for a man who grew up so poor.

For the first half of the book it’s lust, lust, lust. Endless sections of lusting. Every scene has to have either Ryland or Lucy mentally lusting over the other to the point I’m surprised they don’t walk into walls or run over fire hydrants because of it. Lust is fine but not so much that it takes over and overshadows their other connections which I really wanted to see.

Then at the halfway mark, things flipped and suddenly after pretend dating for a few weeks, the two of them go out to dinner and finally share their secrets about her illness and his childhood poverty. Only there’s the one brief mention of both issues and then zip! everything gets buried again. Lucy’s art also gets similar short shrift. She paints and sketches a little, bares her artistic soul to Ryland off page and then events speed on along leaving that behind as well.

It takes an overseas article about the two of them together to get Lucy all bothered and finally facing that she’s falling in love with Ryland. I’m glad I get told this because without that, I wouldn’t have thought so. Lucy then goes from feeling she’s in love to pissy that Ryland so easily dismisses this as mere tabloid gossip. Now that she’s on the love bandwagon, she wants to be a WAG for real. But no dice from Ryland who’s still focused on getting back to his MLS team. That is until a tornado ripping through town while he’s back in Phoenix gets his attention and – I guess also due to the end of the book rapidly approaching – he admits his feelings and goes for the engagement ring GOAALLL. Only, this feels rushed to me as well.

The parts of the book I do really like are Lucy and Ryland’s coaching of the youth soccer/football team. It’s this that awakens Ryland’s renewed dedication to the sport and determination to regain his teammates and the fans’ respect. I did wonder though why such a star player would be allowed to recuperate from his injury so far from the team doctors and trainers. Yes, I know the book plot depends on it but it still seems incorrect.

Too much lusting then such a quick turnaround to instalove means the book doesn’t work for me as a romance. I also felt that there were too many issues that only served as tokens of character development without adding substantially to the story. As well, for a great deal of the book, I felt distanced from the characters- as if I’m being told about them but not that I’m really “feeling” what they’re going through. For me, the sports sections are the best but they’re not enough to carry the rest. D

~Jayne

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It’s hard to find good GLBT movies without some guidance as to what’s worth it and what’s dreck. As such, I often go with average ratings at sites like Netflix and IMDB. “2 Girls in Love” is a movie that has overall average ratings (which is still better than some of the 2 star ones other films have) so that’s why I picked it to try.

Randy Dean (Laurel Holloman) is a tomboy who works part time at her aunt’s gas station and day dreams through school – which she hates. One day bookish, popular Evie Roy (Nicole Ari Parker) stops there and the two girls meet. Soon they’re beginning to explore their growing feelings for each other but lots of issues – their sexuality, their difference in social standing at school and their families – still stand in their way. Will they persevere in spite of all that?

This is an early film for both lead actresses and it shows. It’s also an early, indie, low budget film for the director and it shows. Sometimes this works to the advantage of the film. The story is about two teenagers finding and exploring love and I’m sure we can all remember how awkward that was. The shyness and nervousness both girls show might be acting but I think it’s a combo of that plus themselves. However that’s what they’re supposed to show and they do in a believable manner. During other scenes though, they tend to either over or under act leading to frenetic moments and stiff, dragging ones.

Writer/Director Maria Maggenti has said that she based the character of Evie on herself and the relationships of the film on those of her first one. As such most of the movie works well in the progression of the love story. But towards the end, the relationship and the fall out from it are already covered so… then what? We’re given a frantic dash to the finish that’s something out of a “madcap” 60s film where the entire cast has to go spontaneously crazy and all race around before winding up together in an ending that just sort of peters out.

What I do like about Maggenti’s directing are some short cuts and make do’s that she used in order to save money. There aren’t a lot of secondary characters so the film focuses more on the relationship between the girls. She also does some interesting stationary shots such as when calm Evie has dinner at Randy’s house and the usual chaotic environment is shown by a focus on wide eyed Evie with the other characters – all talking at the same time – quickly passing back and forth before her and in and out of the shot. If you watch with the director’s commentary, Maggenti is open about all the things that worked and all the goofs and wished for do-overs of a first time film maker.

As for the secondary characters – some work better for me than others. There are three interchangeable friends Evie has whose main function is to work as the social cost and consequence she has to pay for her relationship with Randy. Randy’s lesbian aunt, the aunt’s lover and former lover – both of whom have very similar hair which the director said is something she’s noticed about her own relationships – charge through scenes but aren’t really given that much to do individually. Evie’s uptight mother has a marvelous hysteria scene after she discovers what Evie’s been up to and with whom.

And then there’s Randy’s GBF played by then drag queen Nelson Rodriquez who died shortly after from AIDS. I liked that he was flamboyant but not limited to talking about clothes and interior design. Instead he chides Randy about her math studies and has a funny turn in the above mentioned final chaos of the movie. My favorite, though, is gas station worker Regina who is played by Dale Dickey – Patty the day time hooker on “My Name is Earl.” God I love this actress.

Since it’s basically a YA story, I like that it ends more HFN than HEA. It’s got some sweet moments and a few funny ones. It works as not only as a GLBT film – about both coming out and being out – but also touches on YA themes – about young love and the pressures of social classes. For me the film is good but not great. I’d love to see what it would have been like with a little more money and some more experience under the director’s belt. C+

~Jayne

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“At the turn of the twentieth century, London’s political climate is in turmoil, as women fight for the right to vote. Dody McCleland has her own battles to fight. As England’s first female autopsy surgeon, she must prove herself as she proves that murder treats everyone equally.

After a heated women’s rights rally turns violent, an innocent suffragette is found murdered. When she examines the body, Dody McCleland is shocked to realize that the victim was a friend of her sister – fuelling her determination to uncover the cause of the protestor’s suspicious death.

For Dody, gathering clues from a body is often easier than handling the living – especially Chief Detective Inspector Pike. Pike is looking to get to the bottom of this case but has a hard time trusting anyone-including Dody. Determined to earn Pike’s trust and to find the killer, Dody will have to sort through real and imagined secrets. But if she’s not careful, she may end up on her own examination table.”

Dear Ms. Young,

Is this to be the start of a new series? It seems like it and may I be selfishly honest and say that I hope so. I’ve got to get a replacement for my historical forensic mystery fix since Ariana Franklin’s death.

The story is chock full of lots of details about the time, place and events. I know a little about the British women’s suffragette movement but not much. The background info you provide is greatly appreciated and I think you accomplished easing it into the narrative without coming to a full stop to do so. I have to agree with Mrs. McClelland, Dody’s mother, that rights are fought for by the rich and privileged while food is the main worry of the poor and downtrodden. Lord love us with a father like Mr. McClelland.

Pike could have been written as a man with moody angst but instead he buttons it all up and holds it in. I think he’d be almost embarrassed to be seen as angstful, much like going outdoors in nothing but his drawers. He’s got just enough opposition and problems to deal with on the force balanced with his sense of purpose and seeking justice and the truth. I totally believe that he’s the kind of man who would feel ashamed of any tiny infraction so when he hides evidence that would show his own daughter is a wannabe suffragette, I feel his inner conflict over it. Chief Inspector Shepherd is a piggish “keep women in their places” type but Pike appears to know how to get around him and his roadblocks. I would hate to think that Churchill was in on all the police violence at the rally. Pike’s also human – he doesn’t always know how to get along with and speak to his teenage daughter and enjoys a night playing piano at the local pub. It all makes him more human to me and to Dody, once she learns all this.

Dody is strong minded enough to get through medical school and find a speciality that would accept her but practical about not rocking the medical boat. She’s also got her doubts about the tactics of the suffragette movement and the lengths toward which they’re headed. She keeps her head down and forges on, remaining as invisible as she can in order to get as far as she is able. One problem I had with her backstory was that I felt as if I stepped in halfway through Dody’s off again romance with Rupert the weenie. Frankly, I wasn’t sorry to see him go early in the story. Dody also has to contend with her fiery sister Florence who is totally on board with the more militant suffragettes who are ready to seek the advice of Fennians and resort to outright violence to further their cause and gain notoriety.

Dody and Pike are both outsiders – she because of her gender and her, frankly, cuckoo family while Pike was not a gentleman who rose to be an officer in the Army only to have that held against him in the Met. But they’re both truth seekers who don’t shirk from dirty work even if it’s hard to do and hard on them. They start to work together even before they realize it – each determined to get to the bottom of Lady Catherine Cartwright’s death and “helping” each other along by turning a blind eye to “after hours” sleuthing. Even if she doesn’t entirely trust him as a police officer and he is appalled at the suffragette movement. Each takes a sly dig at the other – he in presenting her with the details of the execution of Dr. Crippen and she in daring him to watch the forced feeding of the hunger striking women. Yet they’re both fighters, in their own way, determined to make a difference.

Forensic and police investigational science have certainly progressed and the conditions under which Dody and Pike have to work certainly highlights it. There definitely won’t be any Forensic Files type case cracking here. Nevertheless it’s all fascinating to read about and again shows how keen Pike and Dody are to take advantage of whatever might help them solve cases.

I have a silly question. Would an aristocratic family have the last name of Cartwright? Wouldn’t that be a laborer’s last name?

I tend to agree with Dody that slow but steady and not blowing up things is the way to seek positive social change but given the attitude of some of the men, it’s hard not to see how the more militant suffragettes arrived at their beliefs. Most of the secondary female characters served to illustrate one aspect or another of how the law still favored men even with the easier divorces now available. Dody’s dreary rounds at the hospital – dealing with women who died of septicemia from botched abortions or helping women suffering from the delivery their tenth child in that many years – showed another side of how hard it was to be a woman then. Even jail privileges are unequal. One thing that I realized early on was that due to the setting of the book (1910) I had to tamp down my disappointment that it wasn’t going to be in this book that the vote was won.

The mystery of who killed Lady Catherine is more something that propels other things in the plot than the main focus of it all yet I, along with Pike and Dody, still wanted to know the answer. And the answer is a wee bit anti climactic and soap opera-ish. The villain turns out to be one of those who change fairly quickly and suddenly start foaming at the mouth before conveniently spouting off about why they did what they did. Still the final section of the story unfolds in a way that slowly and relentlessly cranks up the tension. I knew what was coming and was still quickly flipping pages as Florence got deeper into trouble while Dody and Pike raced to save her.

As I mentioned at the beginning, I hope to see more of this series and am excited that you’ve chosen to set it during such a tumultuous era. Pike and Dody have caught my attention as professionals as well as – perhaps in the distant future – possible romantic partners. Only time will tell. B

~Jayne

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“A mom in her early fifties, Clover knows she no longer turns heads the way she used to, and she’s only really missed when dinner isn’t on the table on time. Then Clover wakes up one morning to discover she’s invisible–truly invisible. She panics, but when her husband and son sit down to dinner, nothing is amiss. Even though she’s been with her husband, Arthur, since college, her condition goes unnoticed. Her friend Gilda immediately observes that Clover is invisible, which relieves Clover immensely–she’s not losing her mind after all!–but she is crushed by the realization that neither her husband nor her children ever truly look at her. She was invisible even before she knew she was invisible.

Clover discovers that there are other women like her, women of a certain age who seem to have disappeared. As she uses her invisibility to get to know her family and her town better, Clover leads the way in helping invisible women become recognized and appreciated no matter what their role.”

Dear Ms. Ray,

I fell in love with your first book “Julie and Romeo” then wryly laughed my way through “Step-Ball-Change” though I will admit to failing to keep up with the books after that. So many books, so little time. I did remember that first book from time to time and say “I need to see what she’s written lately” so I was a happy bunny when we were offered your latest book for review. After reading it, I’m glad to discover that your gentle, humorously zinging style is still humming along.

I have heard the sayings for years – that older women become invisible to strangers then to family, that older women are overlooked, that older women fade into the background. Maybe this is why older women turn to purple to stand out? Since I’m headed towards this age, the plot made me sit up and want to read the book. But to Clover, it actually comes true. She also discovers that it leads to some freedoms. If no one cares what you wear, then you can wear anything, go anywhere, say anything and shrug your shoulders saying “the hell with it.” I’m understanding my mother more and more lately.

The book is more women’s fiction – even older women’s fiction as Clover ponders her two children 20 and 24 which might be a turn off to some but the marriage she has is a sturdy one and I enjoyed seeing how it’s held together over the years, though it does take her busy doctor husband a while to catch on to the obvious. Still, once he does he proves that he’s one of the good ones as he rallies to the cause.

Vlad and Nick and Miller, the young men of the story, give me hope – they’re basically decent guys who’ve been raised right by their mommas – which is high praise in the South. Daughter Evie I wanted to shake. Just wait til she gets older and some of that Beautiful Woman light begins to fade and she can’t get by on her looks any more. I hope Clover is still there to gently let her in on “life after your youth is past.”

There are things here that the reader is required to accept: that there is an army of invisible women out there and that some people have actually noticed this – as in the case of the nurse or the teacher Lila Robinson who got fired after fading away – and that it hasn’t become a headline news story. With all the 24 hour news stations desperate for copy and something to fill air space this stretches credulity but that’s what must be believed. Okay, fine. Clover’s initial reaction – stunned panic – makes sense as do her practice efforts about how to live with it and get around in society. Her finding the help group would be a Godsend of support – emotional and practical. There truly are support groups for everything these days.

Yet I’m surprised that it’s taken the Invisible Women so long to confront the pharmaceutical giant responsible for manufacturing the meds that turned them invisible. Or that Jane, the woman who’s devoted so much time to haunting their headquarters, reading mail, listening to conversations and being able to find out so much about what’s going on there, wouldn’t have confronted TPTB there or have met with the chemist who agreed to talk to them. She and Clover are remarkably calm in the face of his brusque response to their enquiries. I think I would have acted on Clover’s thought to overturn his desk and run amok. I’ve always wanted to run amok.

Still, once the ladies make up their minds and decide that they are “mad as hell” and they’re not going to take it anymore, they get organized via Social Media, T-shirts, picket signs and physical presence to make their voices heard and their demands known. Power to the invisible women!

But there’s more to this book than just one women or some women who feel that they were practically invisible to their families, coworkers and friends before actually turning invisible. Clover discovers that there’s a lot she doesn’t know about her husband and son. So the question is, how much do most of us really see those around us? Beyond how the presence or lack of it of those people impacts us and our day, how much attention do we pay to them and how much should we? That’s a sobering mass of thoughts to think on. B

~Jayne

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2. REVIEW: Double Dare by Jeanne St. James
3. Friday Film Review: The Closer You Get (aka American Women)

“How much can you hide?

Jemima Hutton is determined to build a successful new life and keep her past a dark secret. Trouble is, her jewellery business looks set to fail – until enigmatic Ben Davies offers to stock her handmade belt buckles in his guitar shop and things start looking up, on all fronts.
But Ben has secrets too. When Jemima finds out he used to be the front man of hugely successful Indie rock band Willow Down, she wants to know more. Why did he desert the band on their US tour? Why is he now a semi-recluse?
And the curiosity is mutual – which means that her own secret is no longer safe …”

Dear Ms. Lovering,

Since I enjoyed the first book of yours I read, “Slightly Foxed,” I jumped at the chance to check out your latest release, “Please Don’t Stop the Music.” Your description of it as a ‘dark psychological romance – with jokes’ is dead on. I knew from the beginning that there were going to be angsty emotional revelations along the way but I still enjoy laughing a bit on the road to them.

These are two very wounded people who have both current and past problems. They have to open up in order to heal and allow for possible future love and you take the time to pry them open, almost like clams, to allow this. Thank you for giving them REAL problems and not just “I’m so misunderstood by the world” navel gazing idiocy. I like that you give us some clues about what these issues are – it’s not all coy as some stories are – but the final revelations are still powerful and haunting. But it’s good that Rosie and Jason realize that Jem is hiding something – what friends would they be if they didn’t plus they’d look like idjuts.

I can kind of understand why Jem keeps running and almost runs again one last time. She’s got some serious self-esteem issues she has to deal with. Her warped views on sexuality were gained at a relatively young age and she’s both ashamed of what she allowed to happen and still not quite over it. But as Ben points out – look how she’s grown in the time since he’s met her. She is willing to confront Saskia (what’s with the popularity of this name anyway?) to help her friend Rosie and him and at least she realizes what her problem is even if she’s still sees running as how to overcome it. Ben does a wonderful thing for her in following her and *showing* her what she means to him. I don’t think Jem would believe it any other way.

Ben also has to overcome not only his “sex, drugs and rock’n'roll” past but also the guilt over how he left the band and the grief of the reason why. He had to get over the ‘towering artiste knocked down in his prime’ delusion. But get beyond it he finally does as he admits that he wouldn’t take his past back as a gift if it meant not having Jem in his life. That was a powerful revelation. No, he’ll never play again but he can still work in music.

Even after the explanations of why she did it, I have to say that Saskia gets away with too much. Her reason for what she did doesn’t excuse her for trying to ruin two lives – and harming Ben’s business as well. And she appears to be walking away from it scot free. Perhaps Jem and Ben will put the York trade authority screws to her but I needed to see some punishment or retribution.

I love that baby Harry isn’t a little bundle of total joy and happiness for Rosie. He’s not just a plot moppet but a real influence on Rosie and Jem and Jason’s lives. Rosie’s issues are certainly different and I did wonder about her relationship with the father but you turned that for an interesting twist as well. I like the sort of open ended finale – Jem and Ben look to be working things out. Jason and Rosie as well but no wedding bells are shown yet.

Yeah for the York setting again. Yes, there are other parts of England besides the Home Counties and London and I’m delighted to see them! I love the image of the center of York with streets that fold in on each other and hidden nooks and crannies. Plus I enjoyed the sardonic English humor in the story. Jem and Ben take the piss out of each other on a regular basis.

The book is Chick Lit’ish in that it’s mainly first person but there’s much more angst and we get Ben’s thoughts through his journal, which I loved. You’ve done a good job showing the arc of the characters’ development and change – of Jem and Ben falling in trust with each other, feeling safe and happy with each other, then falling in love. You put these two through the wringer a time or three but theirs is a HEA I believe in. B

~Jayne

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We’re “them.” We’re “they.” We are the Men in Black.

I thought I’d throw another bromance onto the review heap. Not that Agent J and Dr. Laurel Weaver’s flirting isn’t enjoyable but the real strength of this film is how well Tommy Lee Jones and Will Smith play off each other as their characters attempt to save the Earth.

Agent Kay (Tommy Lee Jones) has been helping to save the planet and monitor the aliens who live here for close to 35 years. When his partner reluctantly decides it’s time to retire, Kay and his boss Zed (Rip Torn) begin to test and audition replacements. James Edwards (Will Smith), an NYPD officer, caught Kay’s eye when he unknowingly ran down a cephalapoid while trying to make an arrest. Impressed with Edwards’ stamina and smarts, Kay lures him to the (hilarious) testing where Edwards proves he has what it takes as he thinks outside the box and make correct split second decisions. When he accepts, Edwards becomes J, the newest agent of the MIB.

And just in time as something has the alien population running scared and fleeing the planet. Turning to a major source of their intel, the tabloids, Kay and J interview a woman (Siobhan Fallon) who claims an alien stoled her husband Edgar’s (Vincent D’Onofrio) skin. Kay quickly realizes that a Bug has landed and is running loose in NYC. Heading to the morgue, they discover the M.E. Dr. Laurel Weaver (Linda Fiorentino) has two alien bodies there but the mystery of what the Bug in the Edgar suit wants only deepens. It takes a trip to interrogate Frank the pug to reveal what Kay and J have to find before the Bug does because if they can’t stop him, the Arquillians are going to kill us all.

I love MIB. MIB II not so much and I’m bracing myself for the third installment due out this Spring in the hope that it will rise to the level of this one. But the original movie is hard to top. From the opening credits of a dragonfly flitting through the Universe before ending up as splat on a windshield it’s a pretty much a wild, nonstop ride. There is a bit of boring exposition as Kay fills J in on the history of the MIB and knowledge of aliens on this planet but most of the rest of the running time isn’t wasted. Considering how much the plot was changed as it went along, the final result ends up fairly cohesive. It’s also a beautiful film to look at – the outside NYC scenes show off the beauty of the city while the inside sets are all 1960s space age curves.

The relationship of Kay and J carries the film. Smith and Jones have fabulous chemistry. They totally play off each other with Jones’ straight faced delivery complimenting Smith’s wisecracking facade. But J and Kay aren’t just Super Men with major firepower shown saving the world in a rain of special effects. They’re human. They get busted up, J cares about the effect of Kay’s memory messer-upper on the people who get flashed and he wants the cover stories which replace those peoples’ memories to be nice and – in the case of Edgar’s wife – empowering. Kay regrets the loss of his most recent partner and still loves the woman he had to leave behind all those years ago when he became an agent. You can see the weight of all his memories on his face. Yet, despite the need for them to toil in obscurity, there are the occasional nice moments such as when J helps deliver a bouncing, newborn baby….squid.

Rip Torn as Zed conveys gravitas in the face of the imminent destruction of the planet yet can still slide in a few zingers about the years of government training of the other candidates and how the MIB aren’t hosting an intergalactic kegger. Linda Fiorentino is lovely to look at and her character catches onto the situation quickly. I was delighted when she manages to not only save herself but also provides the final blast needed to rid the world of the Bug. One of my favorite tertiary characters is Beatrice the beaten down wife of Edgar. Fallon manages to make me laugh out loud without saying a word just from the expressions on her face.

But it’s Vincent D’Onofrio’s performance as the Bug which rulz. I can’t imagine how much work he had to put into pulling off the look and mannerisms of having a giant cockroach stuffed into his skin. The loping gait, the awkward way he poses his arms as he sits in the Zap-Em truck, the smash and grab techniques at the jewelry store and sidewalk post-card seller’s stand – even the way he talks…he makes me believe he’s something otherworldly. It’s also hilarious to watch how frustrated and pissed the Bug gets the longer he’s stuck in New York. Even Edgar’s cows don’t give him any respect.

The special effects still hold up fairly well with lots of exploding blue goo and Bug slime everywhere. I still think “the little guy in the big guy’s head” looks a little cheesy but the final sequences with the Bug are good. The “ingrate” worms who loaf around all day at the MIB headquarters are funny and the pug in a “I ♥ NY” T-shirt is cute. One of my favorite funny scenes is the way J discovers exactly what happens when he pushes the red button in the Ford P.O.S. as he and Kay are headed to Queens through the tunnel to the music of Elvis Presley.

The movie is supposed to be fun and breezy light entertainment and succeeds as such. Director Sonnenfeld keeps the story focused and the pace fast as it zips to a conclusion. The commentary tract is also interesting to listen to as he and Jones discuss what went into making the movie and seemingly have a good time remembering the whole process. Are we just an intergalactic Aggie in an alien game of marbles? Who knows? But no one better give me a flashie thing as I’d probably forget to put on my Ray Bans and would end up zapping myself to mental oblivion.

~Jayne

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Your book “Princess Furball” was recommended to me by etv13, one of our readers here, after I posted a review of the movie “Donkey Skin.” I instantly fell in love with the name since I have two little Princess Furballs at home. Well, I finally got my own copy of the book and after finishing it, I have to say it’s charming.

The story is not quite “Donkey Skin” and not quite “Three Nuts for Cinderella” but rather a blending of the two. And here the theme of incest is not included. Instead the King, who has ignored his daughter for years after his wife died, promises her to an ogre who will pay handsomely for her hand in marriage. But her beloved nurse, who thought of the Princess as a daughter, had made sure to see that the Princess was learned. So she grew up to be strong, capable and clever enough to think of a way out of the hateful marriage. Of course it involves a handsome Prince but also three beautiful dresses, three keepsakes from the Princess’ mother and a coat made of the hides of 1000 different animals. And naturally there’s a happy ever after plus one yummy looking wedding cake.

The illustrations by Anita Lobel remind me a touch of the Impressionists of the late 19th century and are colorful and skillfully done. I think any child would be enchanted by them and able to follow the story through them. The story is simply told though detailed all the same. And though I don’t want to get bogged down in PCness, it’s nice to see a Princess who is responsible for her own HEA who gets a Prince who recognizes that she is as clever as she is lovely. B+

~Jayne

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Honestly, if someone told me a week ago that I’d be reading a book about a woman with a crappy life who survived a car wreck with only a concussion that now lets her communicate with a pet lizard and that in order to pay the astronomical medical bills pilling up to keep her comatose young niece in a speciality hospital has taken up a mobster’s offer to undertake a hit, I would have told them, “Are you shitting me?!” No, wait that’s not emphatic enough. It would probably have been more like, “Are you shitting me and are you on crack?!” But here I sit having just finished “Confessions of a Slightly Neurotic Hitwoman” and all I can pant is “Give me more!” And, “What happens next?!”

So how did I make the decision to read the book? Jane sent it along with a bunch of others and frankly I needed to weed through them all and clear out the “no f’ing way” ones to make room for the new boxes that arrived. With my mission in mind, I began reading the back blurbs and opening chapters. The back blurb of your book sounded like it could be awful. Settling in beside a towering pile of paperbacks, I dug in thinking, “one chapter and we’re probably done here.” Only the next thing I knew, it was 50 pages later. Let me say that the back cover, while certainly accurate, doesn’t give a hint of the style that kept me compulsively turning pages or the plot that grabbed me by the throat and wouldn’t let go.

You certainly do have a “voice” and I completely enjoyed my time listening to it. But I’ll say that it’s probably not for everyone and that since a lot of people don’t like 1st person POV, that won’t help further the cause much. But I loved it. Maggie is a breath of sardonic fresh air. But beyond the deadpan humor and sarcasm, what kept me reading is that Maggie isn’t always right and certainly isn’t perfect. But her heart is in the right place and she tries. And for her little niece, she’ll do anything even if that means buying live crickets for “Godzilla” Katie’s brown anole lizard pet who speaks to Maggie in the voice of Alan Rickman. Maybe a little too much time spent watching Snape?

The fact that I enjoyed the bizarre paranormal aspects of the plot is amazing since I generally run a mile to avoid them in the books I read. However, “God” as he prefers to be called, is a truly delightful character though I wonder how he and Doomsday will work out the living arrangements. Then again maybe they bonded over the second hit Maggie had to carry out with the help of Patrick the detective/mob hitman? Which leads me to another reason I shouldn’t have liked this book because if there was ever any more rock solid conflict standing between two people who crackle with chemistry, I haven’t come across it. Talk about a fucked up family life that Patrick deals with…And let’s not forget Maggie’s meddling aunts, her father in the State Pen, and her mother in the psych ward – these people have issues.

Some might say you kinda cop out by giving Maggie and Patrick the power to turn down hits they don’t want to carry out or that the two people who are killed in the book are made to be such obvious villains with no redeeming qualities but there are limits beyond which I won’t go in books I read for fun so I’ll accept all this. And reiterate that I can’t wait to find out 1. How crappy the bridesmaid dress Maggie will have to buy will be. 2. If Paul has come into Maggie’s life for the reason I think he has. 3. If “God” will help Doomsday with her grammar. 4. Does he talk to Katie too? and 5. At whose wedding will Maggie have to take out her next hit? I’ll be waiting for answers. B

~Jayne

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Related posts:

1. REVIEW: Slightly Foxed by Jane Lovering
2. REVIEW: Confessions of a Werewolf Supermodel by Ronda Thompson
3. REVIEW: Slightly Psychic by Sandra Steffen

Genre: Historical black comedy

Grade: B

I’ve been meaning to watch and review this one for ages but got the boost I needed when I saw it’s being shown today on TCM. Used to be it was impossible to find this one on DVD but recently both a region 1 and region 2 version have been released. The full movie can also be watched at IMDB and on youtube. With the recent use of Victorian England as a popular historical romance era, “The Wrong Box” can slide in right between your reading schedule.

Seventy-some years earlier, the parents and guardians of twenty young, upperclass English boys entered them in a tontine. The idea is that for each boy, the sum of 1,000 pounds is entered into a “pot” – to be appropriately managed financially – and that the last surviving member gets the whole ball of wax. With the death of the third to the last man, two elderly brothers, Masterman (John Mills) and Joseph (Ralph Richardson) Finsbury, are now the only living ones left. They’ve been estranged for years but both are eagerly taken care of by their respective heirs with the hope that their man will outlive the other and thus get the (current value) 111,000 pounds.

Masterman appears to be fading at last and a telegraph is sent to Joseph summoning him to London. Accompanied by his two greedy nephews Morris (Peter Cook) and John (Dudley Moore), Joseph takes the train but a horrible crash, a badly mangled body and Joseph’s propensity to wander around and get caught up spewing facts to complete strangers leaves the nephews certain that he’s dead. Now what do they do? If they can conceal Joseph’s death until after Masterman kicks off and then stage their uncle’s “death,” they can claim all that lovely money. But Masterman isn’t ready to hand in his notice quite yet plus Joseph has managed to make it to London leading to fast and furious hijinks as everyone tries to conceal everything just long enough to win the prize.

The – slightly bizarre – opening credits give a hint of the pace to follow. This isn’t a frantic screwball comedy but rather a slower, more stately black comedy that takes a little while to begin building up the pace to the humor. The plot has to be explained, the main characters introduced and the stage set before the macabre fun can kick in. There are misunderstandings, misidentified people, misidentified bodies, a hearse chase through London (these final chase scenes seem to have been so popular with 1960s directors), a final confrontation/explanation at a cemetery and of course the switched – wrong – boxes. And a piano.

Before the main action begins, there’s an amusing sequence which shows the deaths of some of the boys/men – now stop being shocked, this is a black comedy – and believe me, some of them could easily have competed in Monty Python’s “Upperclass Twit of the Year Award.” Even Queen Victoria acts a touch twitish while attempting to knight one of them. At various times throughout the film, amusing cue cards, like those from silent movies, will appear on screen. And be sure to read the order of the cast at the end.

The film is packed with some of the best talent in Britain. Richardson plays a man obsessed with trivia who successively bores anyone unfortunate to encounter him while Mills is his cranky, cantankerous brother who attempts to kill Joseph at least 7 different ways during the short scene of them together. I didn’t mention in the plot but Michael Caine is Masterman’s grandson Michael, who has been selling off all their possessions for years in order to keep a roof over their heads, while Nanette Newman plays Julia, the supposed niece of Joseph. Those two sweet, charming ninnies fall quickly in love-at-almost-first-sight complete with a hilarious scene of them set off into spasms of swooning slo-mo emotion by the mere sight of her ankle and his bare elbow. They were Victorians, remember? Their joy is complete when they discover that their children won’t be idiots, due to the fact that they’re not really related, and that they share being orphans, his parents were killed in a balloon ascension while her missionary parents were eaten by their Bible class.

Peter Cook and Dudley Moore are fabulous together as the two nephews who’ve slaved away at keeping Uncle Joseph well all these years and who, By God!, aren’t going to lose that money now. Cook’s caddish Morris is the true brains of the two while Moore’s randy John never met a chambermaid, or housekeeper, he didn’t like.

But the two actors I found I absolutely adored here are Wilfred Lawson as Peacock, the venerable and doddering butler of the Masterman Finsbury household and Peter Sellers as Dr. Pratt. For the entire film, you’re convinced that Peacock is only a few vertical degrees from falling over or just about to kick the bucket himself yet he doggedly persists in answering the door, announcing visitors, fetching the tea, packing crates of valuables to hock at Sotheby’s and whatever else the Finsburys need of him. It’s literally old family loyalty in action to the end. Both of Sellers’ scenes are played with Cook and you can almost see Cook fighting not to laugh at how funny Dr. Pratt’s lines are. Pay close attention as Sellers mumbles a touch to give Pratt the absent mindedness needed and watch for how he uses a thermometer and a kitten. Be assured though that none of the tens of moggies crowding his decrepit quarters are harmed in the making of this film.

I was amazed that in spite of all the switches, near misses, misunderstandings and skullduggery, the plot is easy to follow and I never once got lost trying to remember who’s stuffed into what. The Victorian settings and decor are suitably overcrowded and dark and there’s a nod to one of the manias of the era in the form of Morris’ egg collection. And of course the whole movie is a love letter to the Victorian fascination with death. The dialogue is subtle and the zingers are understated so listen carefully to catch them all. This is a quiet little gem that sneaks up on you and I’m glad I finally pulled it out from my “recorded off TCM” stack, dusted it off and gave it a spin.

~Jayne

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Dashing and valiantly wounded, Captain John Gallows could have stepped straight out of an army recruitment poster. Leanne Sample can’t help being impressed–although the lovely Red Cross nurse tries to hide it. She knows better than to get attached to the daring captain who is only home to heal and help rally support for the war’s final push. As soon as he’s well enough, he’ll rush back to Europe, back to war–and far away from South Carolina and Leanne. But when an epidemic strikes close to home, John comes to realize what it truly means to be a hero–Leanne’s hero.

Dear Ms. Pleiter,

Ages ago, one of our readers (sorry, I’ve searched through our archives but can’t find the comment) recommended one of your books to me but it’s taken this long before I took her up on the rec. Sigh…I’m bad. Anyway, what finally got me going is the time period you use here. Lately we’ve had a lot of interest at DA in “Edwardian” and “WWI” books so, for me, “Homefront Hero” was perfectly timed.

The story includes one thing I never thought I’d read about – knitting by men – and the 1918 influenza epidemic. Thinking back, the only other two books I recall with mass infection and death are an oldie from Paula Allardyce called “My Dear Miss Emma” that deals with the plague in 18th century Arles and the fantasy book “Warsworn” with its endless sweating disease. This flu is not exactly rainbows and fluffy bunny material but you make it work. After all, Leanne is a nurse, it is 1918 and it would be strange if this event wasn’t mentioned.

It’s smack in the middle of US involvement in WWI then the flu arrives yet the story is filled with humor. I wasn’t expecting this, to be honest. Most Inspies I’ve read have been more on the serious side so your sly wit caught me off balance. But it’s a good off balance, I liked it! This especially comes into play when General Barnes is desperately trying to come up with some way to punish John for going AWOL and staying on campus to face the flu to save Leane and John can’t come up with the type of glib excuse he used to anymore. The perfect solution presents itself and I totally believe it’s inspired (no pun intended) by God. Punishment by life in Washington, DC attending bureaucratic meetings and making speeches – it’s priceless.

Leanne’s initial reactions after meeting “big hero” John are a breath of fresh air. Leanne thinks he’s an arrogant stuck up officer and is determined to not fall for him as she’s sure so many other women already have. It’s a nice change that she doesn’t go all spastic and make a twat out of herself while sticking her nose up in the air in an effort to avoid and snub him. I’m getting so tired of heroines who suddenly can’t manage to put one foot in front of the other when they spot the hero they’re trying to get snooty about.

John reacts with that age old male drive to get a pretty woman to look at him. And that’s before Leane is tasked to teach him how to knit. You go girl with including a modern rage in a period correct way and leveling the romantic power playing field. I also like that Leanne sees John as he really is from almost the beginning without the light of hero worship blinding her. Sometimes he gets frustrated with his injuries and being sidelined and that’s before Leane has to teach him how to turn a sock heel. As a man of action used to getting his way and being athletic, his reactions to his limitations sound very realistic to me. His anger at how he’s being treated like a hero when his actions stemmed from simple self preservation vs the actions of those on the front line whom he considers to be the true heroes deserving of this praise also make sense.

So…the socks and knitting stuff is fun but, as I alluded to above, the book dips into some pretty serious stuff even before the discussions on religion. Leane learns the hard way about soldiers attempting to deal with post combat mental issues and the sad outcome makes the book seem more realistic. Then comes the flu.

Okay nothing pretty here but then it doesn’t sound like a walk through the park. Applause for not sugar coating anything yet still keeping the details from getting too icky. Most of the time I’m not looking for icky in a romance novel. Your descriptions also convey the terror, horror and helplessness everyone must have been feeling. I just hope we never see another pandemic like this again.

How the religious aspects of an inspirational are handled can keep me reading or cause me to call it a day. Leanne is already a very religious person so the inclusion of her faith in the book seems natural. I didn’t feel it was overdone or being jammed down my throat in an effort to convert me. As I mentioned in the review of “Her Rebel Heart,” I have an easier time reading historical inspies and since this is also a wartime setting, that helps too. Yet it’s not the war that convinces John but Leanne’s daily demonstrations of quiet faith during which she doesn’t attempt to harangue him towards God – and I so like that – plus the life or death situation they go through that gets the light to break through for him. I found his discovery of faith to be believable and again didn’t feel I was being preached at. The inclusion of some funny bits after the long, dark night helps as well.

Forgive me if I include a rant about the term “y’all.” If you’re going to use this Southern phrase, please do it correctly. It’s used when addressing more than one person or when talking to one person but in reference to multiple people. /end rant

When the story ends, I completely buy into John’s new found faith and the love that they finally admit they share. It’s a hard fought battle on both sides as they initially are attracted yet feel they have no romantic future but the transition is one I believe and that I enjoyed reading. B

~Jayne

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1. REVIEW: Lust in Uniform by Nicole Allie
2. REVIEW: The Highlander in Her Bed by Allie McKay aka Sue Ellen Welfonder
3. REVIEW: Dumpersterotica by Allie Beck

“Tang Dynasty China, 759 A.D.

Yao Ru Jiang, known as River, has woven many romantic dreams of honorable swordsman Wei Chen from her brother’s stories. Their meeting should have been a happy event; instead, Chen arrives to tell River he is duty bound to kill her brother for rebelling against the warlord they both serve.

River would do anything to distract the handsome, conflicted warrior from his mission—even take him as a lover….”

Dear Ms. Lin,

Though it’s an offshoot of “The Dragon and the Pearl,” felt I could follow “The Lady’s Scandalous Night” without having read the other. The story starts quickly with a pencil sketch to fill in the background of the action plus each character’s thoughts and feelings and intentions. I didn’t feel lost even though I don’t know who Governor Li is or anything about the rebellion.

Reading your intro note about marriages of the time – especially the bit about marriages being complex arrangements of families -helped a lot to enable me to believe in the HEA here. I could feel that Ru Jiang and Chen would already have some feelings for and about each other and with a story this short, they needed them. Chen continuing to offer for her out of a sense of loyalty and duty would be understandable, though not very romantic as needed for our purposes. I required the fact that Chen had heard about her and her family from her brother for so many years to build up and color in the love necessary for this outcome to fly for me. There’s a nice balance here between each person feeling the love and the need for the other. In historicals, it can be a fine line to walk since men usually have most or all of the power. But early on, Chen’s inner thoughts reveal his vulnerability and wish for something deep with Jiang. Even if she doesn’t know it yet, I do and that allows me to patiently wait for their relationship to work out.

“She prepared now for battle with jeweled hairpins and perfume. With silk.” Jiang is as much a warrior in this battle as is Chen. Her weapons are just a little different. Yet when they come together, it feels more like love than practiced seduction, more heart than cold calculation, sweet yet spicy interactions between the two. Jiang is the river who must wind her way around Chen’s heart in order to save her mountain brother.

The inclusion of the background details about Chen and Ru Shan’s sense of honor and why Chen potentially being the one who might end up delivering Ru Shan’s ultimate fate could be seen as the final act of friendship from Chen helps me to understand how such a man as Chen could go after Ru Shan – that he would do it as much for the deep bond they once had as out of duty to the warlord. This is so totally needed in a romance book of today since usually a man killing the heroine’s brother would be a deal breaker for their HEA.

When Chen realizes Ru Jiang’s actions have lead to Ru Shan’s escape, he is understandably angry. The man would be inhuman were he not pissed off. And so with less than half the book left, I was on pins and needles to find out how you would work something out so that this couple could be together with honor still served – because I knew they would never enter a relationship with the matter unresolved. And this is where the book falters for me. Ru Shan is saved by actions off page and not elaborated on in this story and POOF! it’s over. Literally a deus ex machina let-down. Perhaps when I eventually read the other book, things will be clearer but since this serves as both the source of both internal and external conflict, the muddied waters in this book let me down.

The ending is too bad since despite all the obstacles and the short length of this story, you had managed to convince me of a true love and HEA for Chen and Ru Jiang. Still, this is another enticement for me to finally get off my tuchus and get caught up on your full length books. B-/C+

~Jayne

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Related posts:

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2. REVIEW: Taming of Mei Lin by Jeannie Lin
3. REVIEW: The Dragon and The Pearl by Jeannie Lin

Genre: Romantic Comedy

Grade: B

“Changing fortunes await wealthy but dejected industrialist Aditya (Shahid Kapoor) when he meets a spirited chatterbox named Geet (Kareena Kapoor) on a train in this breezy romantic comedy from Bollywood director Imtiaz Ali. Nursing a broken heart, Aditya ends up traveling with the impulsive Geet, who’s on her way to elope with her secret beau. But fate has other plans, and soon Geet and Aditya are thrust together again … perhaps for keeps.”

Since I started watching Bollywood/Kollywood films, I’ve discovered that I don’t like nearly all of them. Sometimes it’s the actors (I can’t stand Rani Muhkerjee) or the plots that veer from frantic fun to drama in the second half (Om Shanti Om) and I’ve sadly returned quite a few to Netflix after hoping they’d work for me as reviews. This time, I determined I’d just watch this one and not get my hopes up at all. And happily, that seemed to be just the ticket as I ended up enjoying it a lot.

Kareena Kapoor is perfect as breezy Geet who can talk a mile a minute and usually has a cheery smile on her face. Her motto in life is live it to the fullest and only regret what you haven’t tried. She works on the Law of Attraction and thinks that what you want to happen to you will happen to you if you want it badly enough. She’s also spontaneous and fun and gets Aditya to join in even when he initially might balk such as when she decides this is the perfect time to jump off a dock into a shallow river. After all, you never know if such a chance will come again. Geet is a character you the viewer just have to relax and go with.

Shahid Kapoor makes Aditya a likable and sympathetic guy. I never once sat back and thought “Oh, cry me a river, poor little rich boy.” He does get irritated at Geet at times but quickly realizes she’s opened up a whole new side of his personality and made him a better person. During the first half of the film, it’s like watching a parched plant soak up water and come to life again. It’s also obvious that he’s starting to care for her and only leaves her (at about the halfway mark) because he wants her to be happy with the man she’s said she wants to marry.

The film depends on some misunderstandings to keep the plot going as Geet hasn’t told her family about the first man she wants to marry for fear they won’t approve and the family must believe there is a relationship between the Geet and Aditya during the final third of the film in order to keep throwing those two together until they finally acknowledge the fact that they’re perfect for each other. However, since similar things are so common in romance novels, this didn’t bother me too much.

The film is fairly fast paced and intensely colorful in that wonderful way of Indian films. There aren’t that many musical numbers but I found myself liking the ones that are there. They’re fun to watch, the lyrics are good and the beats had me bouncing along and trying a few dance steps much to the amusement of my kitties. Some Bollywood film dances are starting to look more like pole tryouts at the local strip club but with the (slight) exception of the final number, that’s avoided here.

“Jab We Met” has the flavor of Hollywood screwball comedies – watch for the wild taxi ride Aditya takes Geet on in order to try and get her back to her train – rounded out with a touch of “she makes him a better man” depth. The 155 minute length seems to zip by and for much of it, I had an almost permanent smile on my face. Looks like I still need some help refining what I like in Bollywood/Kollywood films but this one is a winner for me.

~Jayne

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Reading

Lessons in Laughing Out Loud by Rowan Coleman

I’m not sure what the author was aiming for here. I started this thinking it would be a Chick Lit book with a heroine who is plus sized. The heroine is overweight but it’s because she eats too much, not because she’s large boned. I was getting the feeling that by the end of the book, she would slim down. I have no problems with that but this seemed like it would be the weight version of those books with an unattractive woman who merely needs to get contacts, let her hair loose and get a clothes makeover in order to dazzle. Also, by the 100 page mark the hero (yes, I skipped to the end and peeked) had appeared only once. I debated continuing – the heroine’s boss was a delightful bitch who stole every scene she was in – but it was just too depressing at this point what with the heroine whinging on about her weight and her problems and getting dumped on by everyone. DNF

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The Midwife of Venice by Roberta Rich

This is a book which Jane sent me unsolicited so I had no expectations going into it. For me historical fiction is usually either spectacular or a clunking bomb. This one turned out to be a winner. The period details seemed correct, interesting and dropped into the narrative with a delicate touch. The characters are intriguing and I quickly came to care about them and their fates. This is a book I didn’t want to end. Full review posted this morning.

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The Return of Jonah Gray by Heather Cochran

Jonah Gray doesn’t actually go anywhere in this book. His “return” is his tax return as investigated by IRS agent Sasha Gardner. There’s a lot more to the book besides tax codes and deductions as Sasha has a lot going on in her life besides waiting to audit Jonah. Some is funny, some is bittersweet but I found myself riveted to the book and the bold chances Cochran takes with the plot. Full review to follow.

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Sacre Bleu by Christopher Moore

I’m only one chapter into this one and already I can tell it’s going to be very different from the usual Moore offering. Before I go any further, I think I need to brush up on my late 19th century artists especially Vincent Van Gogh and Henri Toulouse-Lautrec so that I can catch more of the subtle jokes that Moore has supposedly included.

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Master and God by Lindsey Davis

Davis is a long time favorite author of mine who’s written the wonderful Falco historical mysteries set during the Flavian dynasty in ancient Rome. With this book, she’s doing something slightly different from those and – I believe – more like her book “Course of Honour.” The story follows the lives of two people during the reigns of Titus and then Domitian – the second and third Emperors of a dynasty of only three. Gaius is a Praetorian Guard while Lucilla is a hairdresser to the powerful at court. Between them, they manage to be in on most of the important happenings going on and perhaps might find a romance at the end of it all. I’m only a third of the way in but so far it’s fascinating.

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Watching

Gavin and Stacey – a UK comedy about a young Englishman who corresponds with a young Welsh woman for 6 months before they finally meet and begin a romance in person. They hit it off so well, that by the end of the first season they’re already married. I watched this first season while it was still streamable from Netflix and now need to move the next seasons up in the queue. A surprise delight is Alison Steadman in the role of Gavin’s mum. New to me are Ruth Jones as Nessa and James Corden as Smithy – Gavin’s and Stacey’s BFFs who say they hate each other yet end up hot smexing each other every time they’re in the same city.

Burke and Hare – It has Simon Pegg plus Andie Serkis and is directed by John Landis. How could it go wrong? That’s what I’m asking. How on earth could this have been as bad as it was during the 30 minutes I suffered through? Not only was it not funny, it was unfunny meaning for me it tried and painfully failed.

Nurse Jackie – a dramedy about a NYC nurse played by Edie Falco. Jackie is a wisecracking old battle axe of a nurse who’s seen it all and isn’t impressed by hotshot young doctors. She’s a great mentor to new nurse Zoey, a loving mother to her two daughters, a true friend to Dr. O’Hara of the Jimmy Choos, a loving wife to her husband Kevin and has been sleeping with Eddie the ER pharmacist while popping pills on the side. Jackie’s got issues. Season three just became available at Netflix and I can’t wait to see how the intervention goes.

Chariots of Fire – I can’t believe I’d never watched this one either but honestly I hadn’t. And after finally seeing it, all I can say is that tastes certainly differ. This won an Oscar? Really? Because it about put me to sleep. File it under “would probably have enjoyed it more if I’d seen it back in the day.”

Baking

What else have I been up to? Making biscuits, that’s what. I’m a Southerner born and bred yet I blush to admit that I’d never once attempted making biscuits from scratch. That’s what older female relatives, church homecomings and Biscuitville are for. Nevertheless, after our post on Australianisms I decided to give it a go. Armed with a bag of White Lily all purpose flour and Alton Brown’s recipe I finally made my first batch of biscuits. They might not be the prettiest biscuits ever baked but mah Gawd they are good.

Related posts:

1. What Jayne has been reading and watching in early October
2. What Jayne is reading/watching in early September
3. What Jayne is Reading and Watching in late December and early January

I have a love/hate relationship with historical novels. When they work, they can be wondrous – taking me to foreign lands, to different eras, into the rich and complex lives of the characters. Bad ones can seem endless and are worse if I get the feeling that these are just people dressed up in costumes yet spouting 21st century feelings and ideas. “The Midwife of Venice” is a trip to a world I didn’t want to see end.

Hannah Levi is willing to risk death not only for herself but also for the entire Jewish ghetto of Venice. Despite the warnings from the Rabbi, she goes with the rich Christian man and his brother when they come to her squalid home in the middle of the night, pleading for her help. Hannah has a reputation of being the best midwife available and the Conte disregards the edicts against Christians seeking the medical help of Jews in a desperate bid to save the live of his frail, laboring wife and their unborn child. Knowing the danger she faces, even if things go right, Hannah demands the outrageous sum of 200 ducats. Without blinking, the Conte agrees to her price and the three set off to a palazzo so richly decorated it dazzles Hannah who is used to the cramped, dirty surroundings of too many people packed into too little space.

Things are as bad as Hannah fears and it takes all her skill to deliver the child, a beautiful boy, and save the mother’s life but the price Hannah earns is well worth it. With it, she can travel and ransom her husband from slavery at the hands of the Knights of Malta. Isaac had set sail for the Levant in the hopes of making their fortune in one trading trip only to fall prey to the marauding Knights who even the people of Malta agree are little better than brigands and pirates. But once there, he discovers that he is to be sold for the duration of his stay so that his labor will earn his new master money while all wait for the ransom. First one person then another buys him and Isaac works and schemes to survive the ill treatment in order to get back to the woman he loves. When horrific news reaches him and a terrible choice is laid out for him, will he finally give up on the dream of a future with Hannah? And can Hannah escape the clutches of the Prosecuti, the dreadful plague raging through Venice and the revenge minded men determined to see her dead?

Okay, I said I didn’t want to see this world end but I did wonder at how you were finally going to get Hannah in Venice and Isaac in Malta back together again. They’re separated not only by distance but also by the restrictions that have been placed on them. Isaac is a slave on an island and Hannah is dependant on getting enough money to sail after also outwitting those who would see her hung as a witch for her birthing instruments and or strapadoed for rendering aid to a Christian woman. You throw some formidable barriers to their HEA in the way and yet also neatly maneuver them over, around and past those roadblocks in ways that don’t strain my credulity.

1575 Venice and Malta also come to life here. The dark, cramped quarters of the ghetto in which the Jews are forced to live as well as the splendid marble palazzo filled with silks, spices and elegance are vividly recreated. The differences between Hannah’s life as a Jew and the unfettered existence of the Conte and his family are starkly delineated in every scene they both inhabit. The one person I would have enjoyed learning more about is Hannah’s estranged sister Jessica who now makes her way through life as a converted, high class courtesan. I was glad that they managed to talk and forgive before Hannah sails away forever.

Malta, on the other hand, sounds like a place to avoid – or maybe it’s the Maltese. Poor Isaac does make me laugh with his witty, though perhaps best left unsaid comments and thoughts about the people he encounters there. Of the whole lot, Sister Assunta seems the best with loutish Joseph and his sheep piss aromatic trousers a distant last. One thing I like is that not all of the people Hannah and Isaac encounter are bad. True both of them have to use their wits to navigate through life in a world that sees nothing wrong in persecuting Jews but they also discover that in some Christians and Muslims there is goodness to be found as well.

I wasn’t sure how well I’d like a book in which the hero and heroine are separated for almost the entire time. But here it works. Hannah and Isaac think of each other so much that the distance separating them felt as if it didn’t exist. There are little details of their life together they remember and hope to resume as well as major events that have cemented them together as a couple. Isaac might just win my hero of the year award for how he responds to a challenge that I doubt few could match. Though his decision wasn’t shouted from the rooftops and probably went unnoticed by the majority of people on Malta, it’s as big a gesture as any I’ve read about in a long time.

I’d not heard any buzz about “Midwife of Venice” but am glad that Jane sent it along to me to try. Hannah and Isaac are a wonderful, devoted couple and it’s great to see them reach their HEA with a bright and shiny future ahead of them. This is actually one book I’d love to see a sequel to. B+

~Jayne

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Related posts:

1. REVIEW: Venice by Lynne Martin (aka Lynne Connolly)
2. REVIEW: Baby Catcher: Chronicles of a Modern Midwife by Peggy Vincent
3. REVIEW: Highland Champion by Hannah Howell

The rules for Author Promo Night Open Thread are as follows:

The book has to be released in that month (i.e., anything released during the last week of February would be a March release)
You can post for yourself or you can have a friend post for you if the idea of posting about your book paralyzes you .
No self published authors unless you write romance. No, I am not a POD hater, I am just thinking about the manageability of the thread.
Think about the readership. I.e., does your non fiction book about psoriasis really fit?
This one is more of a guideline than a rule, but be smart about your comment because if it is just a link to your website and the title of your book, I doubt you are going to get any interest.
DA reserves the right to delete the post if it promotes objectionable content (i.e., no daddy/daughter incest recommends are going to be allowed. Sorry.)
That’s it. Post away.

Related posts:

1. Open Thread for Authors (Author Promo) for January 2012
2. Open Thread for Authors (Author Promo) for February 2012
3. Open Thread for Authors (Author Promo) for March 2012

Related posts:

1. Open Thread for Readers for March 2012
2. Open Thread for Readers for February 2012
3. Open Thread for Readers for May 2010

This is a movie I wanted to love, yearned to love, and hoped to love. Unfortunately, I didn’t. First, some background. Back around 2003, a friend of mine who lived in Berkshire at the time, told me about a wonderful bookstore she found in London called Persephone Books. After checking out their website, I asked my friend to get a few books for me, one of which was “Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day.” I first read it in 2004 and adored it. When I heard a movie was to be done of it, I was excited. However, when I first saw it, something just wasn’t right and reluctantly I graded it a C. Recently I thought about it again and decided to give it another try hoping that going into it with slightly lowered expectations might allow me to enjoy it for what it is. Second time around and I still feel the same but now I think I understand better what went wrong for me.

Miss Guinevere Pettigrew (Frances McDormand) is a near middle aged spinster who has just been – unfairly she thinks – fired from yet another governess position. When she goes to the employment agency to try for another post, she’s told in no uncertain terms that she’s not fit for anything they have and to please go away. She overhears about a position at the LaFosse household and, in desperation, steals the card and presents herself there as having just been sent from the agency. What she finds is that she is not dealing with children but rather a ditzy wannabe starlet whose life is a mess. Delysia LaFosse (Amy Adams) is juggling three men (Mark Strong, Lee Pace, Tom Payne) in her life while she tries to land the lead in a West End musical which she thinks will launch her Hollywood career. Miss Pettigrew quickly steps in and begins to arrange Delysia and the people in her life who include Edythe (Shirley Henderson) and her fiance Joe (Ciaran Hinds). But when she thinks Delysia is throwing away true love for a chance at fame, Miss Pettigrew offers some sage advice which just might end up giving her a shot at a HEA she never saw coming.

Watching “Miss Pettigrew” for a second time it finally dawned on me that neither of the lead actresses work for me until more than halfway into the movie. Usually accents aren’t a deal breaker for me but Frances McDormand’s English accent always sounded off. I couldn’t stop thinking “This is McDormand using a fake accent.” I loved how she sounded in “Fargo” but here it seemed like she needed a few more lessons with her accent coach. She’s also supposed to be swept into a fairy tale going from almost living on the streets to the heady lifestyle of the Bright Young Things in late 1930s London – all in one day. But McDormand makes Pettigrew too clunky, too much a stick in the mud and I can always tell she’s acting. I never get carried away in the fantasy because for the most part, she doesn’t.

As for Adams, I love her in “Enchanted,” liked her a lot in “Leap Year” and “Sunshine Cleaning” but here she’s too frantic. Trying too hard to be screwball and not quite pulling it off. Her performance in the first half of the film felt forced instead of effortless. I could see her acting too. The role needed a Carole Lombard or a Marilyn Monroe. I’m not sure if another director could have gotten the delicate balance out of Adams that the part needs but I didn’t feel the madcap.

For both of them, their performances didn’t click for me until the second half when the film shifts to a more serious note. It’s when Miss Pettigrew tells of her lost love who died in the trenches of WWI in France and Delysia confesses how scared she is of making the wrong choices and loosing what little she really has that I felt anything for their characters. But then this also pretty much puts the kibosh on the fairy tale feel the film should be maintaining until the end.

There are elements of the film and actors who do work for me. The costumes are fabulous, especially Delysia’s French silk knickers. The sets are lovely Art Deco and the London locations are fab. The music is well chosen and used. I also love the cars. Shirley Henderson is great as the brittle and vindictive Edythe. Mark Strong, who I would love to see in more sympathetic roles, does his usual slightly sleazy gangster. I can see his character becoming a black marketeer in the war to come. Ciaran Hinds is lovely as the designer of ladies lingerie who recognizes in Miss Pettigrew a kindred soul. It was their scenes together that sparkled for me.

This film needs to float by like a soap bubble. It needs to sparkle and draw viewers into a magical world where a down on her luck spinster really can come alive and truly “live for a day.” Instead, it felt creaky and lumbering to me. My feelings after seeing it a second time matched those I had after the first viewing – oh, what it could have been. Regardless of how you feel about the movie, if you haven’t already, do yourself a favor and read the book. It really is delightful.

~Jayne

I’m going to include buy links for the book.

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Related posts:

1. Friday Film Review: Emma (BBC)
2. REVIEW: Major Pettigrew’s Last Stand by Helen Simonson
3. Friday Film Review: The Importance of Being Earnest

I’ve mentioned before that the reason I don’t read much romantic suspense is that usually one aspect or the other gets shortchanged and I end up disappointed. Your books, however, have usually been the exception. A few little things in them might niggle but I’ve come to expect that in order to include both romance and suspense, everybody cuts a few corners here and there. It comes with the territory. Unfortunately, here I find that both the romance and suspense departments suffer to the extent that despite being glued to the ending to see how the killer is caught, I still can’t recommend this book.

Allison Doyle is a rookie homicide detective on the small town San Marco Police Department. She’s not on their most recent case, that of a young woman brutally assaulted and murdered, but when FBI profiler Mark Wolfe appears and talks to the officers who are working the crime, she senses something big. Acting on a hunch, she tracks him down and gets the details. Wolfe feels certain that the woman’s estranged boyfriend isn’t the culprit and that the real killer is a man Wolfe has tracked and sought for over ten years. Given the past sequence of the man’s crimes, Wolfe knows that they’re racing against the clock to prevent another woman from dying. But first he has to get the SMPD to believe his theory and get on board the investigation. And then they have to track down a cold blooded killer poised to strike again.

I was looking forward to this book for a number of reasons. First, it’s by you and for the most part your books have worked for me where few in this category do. Second, from the back blurb I knew Allison would be the heroine and, though she was a secondary character in “Snapped,” she had impressed me in that book. By the end of this book, I was left wondering what I had ever seen in her and wishing that she doesn’t appear in any more. Allison annoyed the hell out of me.

But first let me talk about what I do like in “Twisted.” From the opening chapter, the menace of the killer is evident. He’s a bad SOB which you chillingly convey without being too graphic. I admit I’m squeamish about that and I don’t like detours through a serial killer’s head. Instead of that you present the highlights of the crimes and use the aftermath of how it’s affected those left behind to freeze my bone marrow. The investigation of the most recent murder hasn’t been perfect and this adds to the plausibility factor. Crime is everywhere and the SMPD is as swamped as most police departments these days. The forensic labs are also choked with tests to run and despite better lines of communication, similarities between cases in different jurisdictions might go unnoticed until too late. Mark Wolfe is also stretched too thin trying to handle all the various cases he’s dealing with some of which you sketch in with enough details to make that believable without derailing the focus on the main plot.

As the task force gets in gear, it’s fascinating to get a bird’s eye view of the nuts and bolts of trying to solve this crime. Officers toss about ideas, work up possible leads, follow those through, reach roadblocks, get dead ended and refocus to approach the case from different angles. It’s like watching a riveting flow chart in action knowing the result at stake is death. The cool things that the people at the Delphi Center can do are the icing on the cake for my forensic geek fandom. Seeing all the work that has to go into outthinking and legally tracking this killer shows the dedication of the people involved as well as their frustration at being so close and still not having all the pieces needed to solve the puzzle.

The final few chapters are suspenseful. You ratchet tension well and generally have me on the edge of my seat as the action roars to a climax. Some of the details of the investigation end up not playing a part in getting the killer but every book about solving crimes needs a few red herrings. Allison does end up face to face with death, which I expected, but the way she gets there doesn’t follow the path I thought it would. I am pleased about that and yet also disappointed because the path you use highlights the two issues that don’t work for me – namely Allison and Mark.

Allison’s the only woman in the homicide department – indeed one of only four women on the force – and as a rookie detective constantly feels the need to prove herself. I can understand that. Law enforcement still seems to be a male bastion and Allison has only taken part in one major investigation. She’s eager to earn her place, improve her skills and become a better officer. Though by the way she acts in this story, she’s got a long way to go and if she’s not more careful, she’ll never live to achieve all that. Allison starts the book by making a major mistake that could have got her killed. She knows this and it gnaws at her that she did it and that Mark saves her bacon. Does it seem to be a learning experience for her? Surprisingly not.

Allison pushes her way into two cases not assigned to her and, to her credit, she does prove that the chief suspect in the most recent case couldn’t have committed the crime and that another case from a year ago is actually linked to the killer Mark’s been after. That opens the door to Mark’s theory and gets a task force in place which Allison then becomes a part of – though in reality it seems that by default and for lack of numbers every homicide detective on the force is on it. Allison knows that this guy is bad, that he’s killed at least six women and that they’re fighting to find him in time so yes, I can see her continuing to push to solve the crime but as the book progresses, Allison makes mistake after mistake.

Okay, I accept that she’s learning but she’s got an expert – Mark – on hand telling her not to do certain things yet Allison just busts past his advice and, in some cases, his orders and keeps barreling along. Oh no, she isn’t going to let up, she isn’t going to stop and think “Hmmm, here’s a seasoned veteran telling me to hold up or not do something. Maybe I should listen to him.” Instead she makes more mistakes. What does she do after one of them? She tries to cover it up so that she won’t look bad and take crap from her fellow officers who will then – justifiably in my opinion – be worried about having her cover their backs. I agree that it could unravel her career but maybe, just maybe, her flipping career does need to unravel before she gets herself or someone else killed.

People rise to the level of their incompetence but due to Mark going along with her pleas, Allison floats above hers and this time, she comes damn close to dying while another woman actually does. Here’s intrepid Allison, following up on a lead after spotting a clue that will lead her to where the killer is and does she call in that little fact? No, she calls in a license plate but fails to mention, “Oh and by the way I am at this location where I think a man who’s raped and murdered over six women might be.” Luckily for her she manages to survive the shit storm that follows.

Allison ends up not wowing me with her police skills but how about the romance? Does it help make up for the deficiencies I feel are in the suspense side of the book? Nope, ‘fraid not. Mark has a failed marriage behind him due to his diligence for his job. And for most of this book, he stays in diligent character. At first Allison seems to just want release from the tension of the case and when she finally gets Mark into bed, I’d swear that her primary feeling is one of satisfaction that she won their battle of wills. It’s way past the halfway point of the book yet I haven’t gotten a sense that anything deeper than scratching an itch is going on. Then suddenly! Allison is showing inklings of hope in her eyes and – after they chase down and arrest a suspect – she pulls Mark aside to try to delve into his feelings and get all emo. I sat with book in hand and jaw hanging open in disbelief. With a suspected killer in an interrogation room, this is not the time to attempt to help Mark deal with his chronic stress and avoid Burnoutville. Mark thinks that he feels he’s in the Twilight Zone and I feel that I’m right there with him. WTF?!

But, hold on. It seems that Allison’s questions about when Mark last took a vacation and her worry about his mental health have finally broken through to him. He jacks up going to a mandatory FBI meeting and instead stays in Texas for another night of hot lovin’. Only it appears to be just that, hot lovin’ but not love. Or not that I can see. And as the story races to a conclusion and the aftermath, honestly I still don’t see love. Lust yes, lots of that but when Allison and Mark tearfully offer each other their “I love you’s” on the last page, it doesn’t move me at all nor do I believe in its staying power. Maybe if they make appearances in future books I can be convinced but for now, the only reason I believe they’re holding hands and getting all dewy eyed is because you tell me they are.

And that is why I reluctantly give one of your books a D grade. Allison ends up being mostly a fail while Mark tumbles off into romantic faildom after keeping his head above the suspense waterline. Without the parts of the investigation that I liked and the way you still managed to make me want to keep reading, it would be lower than that. You’ve written many other good books which I would recommend for newbies to try but this one isn’t one of them.

~Jayne

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Related posts:

1. REVIEW: Twisted by Laura Griffin
2. REVIEW: Untraceable by Laura Griffin
3. REVIEW: Unspeakable by Laura Griffin